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Gapers Block published from April 22, 2003 to Jan. 1, 2016. The site will remain up in archive form. Please visit Third Coast Review, a new site by several GB alumni.
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TODAY

Wednesday, April 24

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Airbags

For the past few months, I’ve been spending an inordinate amount of time alone. “But aren’t we all truly alone, Public Notice gal?” you might be saying. “Oh, quibbler,” I’d say, balling up my fist. “You know what I mean.”

I’m finding that I’m just as at ease taking a seven-mile walk alone as I am going to a Chromeo or Chemical Brothers show solo. I’ll talk with strangers, read a book or listen to my best new friend, video iPod. It’s been nice -- not only because I love this deeper sense of confidence but also because I can stop buying two tickets to concerts and hoping I find someone to go with. I am saving my self-esteem and my hard-earned American dollar! Both of which are worth less every day!

Anyhoo. But some Craig’s Listers haven’t yet embraced the Zen of Alone. They’re advertising for concert dates. With strangers. In the “platonic” section. What gives, Chicago?

A CONCERT DATE ? - m4w
hi there
would love to find a fun person to join me for a dinner and a great concert by a band called genesis on tuesday evening ' i know this is strictly platonic ' but if the chemistry is wright and we might become great friends.
please be over 25 and under 99 years of age please
pic for pic

have a great day and hope to hear soon

Dania had come by the music of Phil Collins through Disney movies while in junior high school. Aided by Amazon.com’s relational database, she soon jumped from PC’s Oscar-winning soundtrack to “Tarzan” to a Japanese import single of “In the Air Tonight” to a signed copy of “Invisible Touch.” But as she’d just entered a pricey graduate program, Dania didn’t have room in her tight budget for Genesis tickets. So she went with Seymour, a 47-year-old stereo installer from Berwyn. It was decidedly not a love connection, but they did have an awesome time at the show and afterwards eating grilled cheese combos at a nearby Denny’s.

Anyone want to go with me to see Sasha VIP style? - m4w - 25
Im a dj at vision, and 1 lucky lady will be selected to come with me to have an unreal time, please make sure you have an ID, and are ready for FUN.
Call me if interested 773.XXX.XXXX

The columnist was baffled. Should she write a little fakey fiction bit about how this guy ended up with an aging Peter Pan-ish club kid who actually went by the meth-fueled moniker Peter Pan? Or should she editorialize about how if you’re a DJ at Vision and need a date, first you should dip yourself (or at least your genitals) in Purell and then head on over to other Weed Street-area bar Hogs and Honeys and see what’s cracking? Regardless of which option she chose for her column, she vowed to somehow work in her current least favorite word, “chillax.”

Peter Bjorn & John w4mw - 32
Hey, I was just wondering if anyone was planning on going to the PB&J show tomorrow night? As of now, I'm going by myself, but I thought it would be fun to meet a person or a group of people and go to the show together. Please note, I *do not* have an extra ticket. Tickets are still on sale and I don't think it will sell out, though you never know. Or perhaps you already have plans on going, in which case I'd still love to meet up. Cheers!

Piper read this ad, but really only saw the “PB&J” bit before she got the “Peanut Butter Jelly” song stuck in her head. All day, she kept humming it. It spread to Kurt, the barista at the Starbucks in her building. To Craig, the temp filling in for their receptionist on vacation. And to Paul, in line behind her at Chase. And it made him laugh out loud thinking about the “Family Guy” take on that song. Piper turned around and started laughing with him. After a few minutes of chattiness, she left with his business card and hope for a new earworm.

Beastie Boys Free .... Riviera Theatre Show - m4w - 40
Hi , I have an extra tic to see Beastie Boys at Riviera Theatre this Wednesday . Tic is free to someone interested , just looking to make new friends . I have Pics if needed , and a myspace if some depth is desired

Reed actually was just looking to make friends. He’d just moved here from Seattle and didn’t know anyone except for the other lawyers in his office at Kirkland & Ellis. He missed his best friend Kate and wanted so much to have that kind of easy, comfortable friendship with a woman. Out of the seven responses he got, Reed exchanged four days’ worth of witty, goofy texts with Dawn, an accountant at Deloitte. She was not Kate, but she was perfectly pleasant and the harbinger of good things to come for Reed in Chicago.

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About the Author(s)

Shylo Bisnett really does only sleep four to five hours per night. And while she loves being alone, she needs a bodyguard type to accompany her to laundromats in the middle of the night.

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