Gapers Block has ceased publication.

Gapers Block published from April 22, 2003 to Jan. 1, 2016. The site will remain up in archive form. Please visit Third Coast Review, a new site by several GB alumni.
 Thank you for your readership and contributions. 


Thursday, October 21

Gapers Block

Gapers Block on Facebook Gapers Block on Flickr Gapers Block on Twitter The Gapers Block Tumblr

« Art Around Town Art History Meets Science: Prints and the Pursuit of Knowledge in Early Modern Europe »

Bucket List Fri Jan 13 2012

My Chicago Bucket List: Wholehearted Living

Previous Entry: The List
Next Entry: Surviving and Thriving at Singles Events in Chicago

Bucket List Number 3. Have a moment of wholehearted living -- aka new hair and no more green onions

You know that moment of revelation; that moment you recognize a pattern and make a paradigm-changing conclusion about life; like when after years of "Our Fathers" you suddenly realize organized religion may be a sham; or when after searching for two guys, one girl threesomes yet again you realize you really just want to eliminate the whole boring girl part and be really gay; like after eating green onions for the hundredth time you suddenly get it, green onions give you horrible gas? You know that moment when you suddenly understand a new truth about life and the world is never the same?

Yeah, I know you know those moments. And I know you know they can really suck. They can be terrifying. They make you suddenly see a world of new truths, truths you may not be ready for.

After getting my ass dumped in an eerily familiar fashion last week, I had one of these moments. I suddenly realized with absolute clarity... that I date punk ass little bitches. OK, so in all fairness and honesty, it wasn't me who came to this conclusion but my kickass therapist who in the Lifetime movie of my life will have a British accent and will sit across from me on the couch and say, "Niki, it sounds like you are dating punk ass little bitches," and then sip her tea.

After trying to defend my punk ass little bitch exes for about two minutes I realized she was right. I date punk ass little bitches.

So I died my hair red.

hairtimeline.jpgIt's not the first time I've resorted to physical changes in order to try to change the internal design. Please see the diagram below for detailed timeline of the many breakups and hairstyles of Niki Fritz.

The thing about realizing you have been dating punk ass little bitches is realizing you are actively seeking out, pursuing and then consequently dating punk ass little bitches; essentially making you a punk ass little bitch yourself. And that is the realization I really had while sitting in my hair stylist's chair; I am a terrified punk ass little bitch who has been dating guys afraid of growing up/getting hurt/their own shadow, because this is easier than dating someone whole and real and unafraid of the world/a relationship/me.

But luckily the New Year is brilliant. It is like a first day of school or any birthday after 21 or that morning after a breakup when your eyes are raw but your sinuses finally clear. It is a new start. It is a time when you can see the pattern and change it.

I've changed my hair to change my mind. And after dating A LOT for the past year (over 12 official dating-partners counted), I've decided to date myself for a while, literally. I'm going to ask myself what I do for a living, what my dreams are and what I'm looking for in a partner and I'm going to try to be honest with the answers. I'm going to shave my legs for myself and take myself to my favorite of couple activities, brunch. I'm going to be comfortable being alone because I'm really with myself.

Not that I won't be hopefully dating other people too. The lure of free online dating is too strong for my curiosity. I'll be joining the ranks again of the online daters but this time hopefully having a little better idea of who I am and who I want.

It's officially 2012 and I'm swearing off green onions for life. I've spent way too much time being gassy.

Addition to Bucket List
#26 Date self more

Photo #1 for Gma


Caption: It snowed Grandma! Finally! And after being really pretty for about 3 hours, Chicago got sloppy and I remembered why I don't drive in this city.

Previous Entry: The List
Next Entry: Surviving and Thriving at Singles Events in Chicago

GB store
GB store

Architecture Tue Nov 03 2015

Paul Goldberger Describes the "Pragmatism and Poetry" of Frank Gehry's Architecture in His New Book

By Nancy Bishop

Architecture critic Paul Goldberger talks about Frank Gehry's life and work in a new book.
Read this feature »

Steve at the Movies Fri Jan 01 2016

Best Feature Films & Documentaries of 2015

By Steve Prokopy

Read this column »


An Angry White Guy
AREA Chicago
ArchitectureChicago Plus
Arts Engagement Exchange
The Art Letter
Art or Idiocy?
Art Slant Chicago
Art Talk Chicago
Bad at Sports
Bite and Smile
Brian Dickie of COT
Bridgeport International
Carrie Secrist Gallery
Chainsaw Calligraphy
Chicago Art Blog
Chicago Art Department
Chicago Art Examiner
Chicago Art Journal
Chicago Artists Resource
Chicago Art Map
Chicago Art Review
Chicago Classical Music
Chicago Comedy Examiner
Chicago Cultural Center
Chicago Daily Views
Chicago Film Examiner
Chicago Film Archives
Chicago Gallery News
Chicago Uncommon
Contemporary Art Space
Co-op Image Group
Co-Prosperity Sphere
Chicago Urban Art Society
Creative Control
Devening Projects
DIY Film
The Exhibition Agency
The Flatiron Project
F newsmagazine
The Gallery Crawl...
Galerie F
The Gaudy God
Happy Dog Gallery
Homeroom Chicago
I, Homunculus
Hyde Park Artcenter Blog
Joyce Owens: Artist on Art
Julius Caesar
Kasia Kay Gallery
Kavi Gupta Gallery
Rob Kozlowski
Lookingglass Theatre Blog
Lumpen Blog
Mess Hall
Neoteric Art
Not If But When
Noun and Verb
On Film
On the Make
Peanut Gallery
Peregrine Program
The Poor Choices Show
Pop Up Art Loop
The Post Family
The Recycled Film
Reversible Eye
Rhona Hoffman Gallery
Roots & Culture Gallery
The Seen
Sisterman Vintage
Site of Big Shoulders
Sixty Inches From Center
Soleil's To-Do's
Sometimes Store
Stop Go Stop
Storefront Rebellion
TOC Blog
Theater for the Future
Theatre in Chicago
The Franklin
The Mission
The Theater Loop
Thomas Robertello Gallery
Time Tells Tony Wight Gallery
Uncommon Photographers
The Unscene Chicago
The Visualist
Western Exhibitions
What's Going On?
What to Wear During an Orange Alert?
You, Me, Them, Everybody
Zg Gallery

GB store



A/C on Flickr

Join the A/C Flickr Pool.

About A/C

A/C is the arts and culture section of Gapers Block, covering the many forms of expression on display in Chicago. More...
Please see our submission guidelines.

Editor: Nancy Bishop,
A/C staff inbox:



A/C Flickr Pool
 Subscribe in a reader.

GB store

GB Store

GB Buttons $1.50

GB T-Shirt $12

I ✶ Chi T-Shirts $15