Gapers Block has ceased publication.

Gapers Block published from April 22, 2003 to Jan. 1, 2016. The site will remain up in archive form. Please visit Third Coast Review, a new site by several GB alumni.
 Thank you for your readership and contributions. 


Saturday, March 2

Gapers Block

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Shechemist / November 29, 2011 8:31 AM

A cake decorating class. I need to get better at decorating my kid's birthday cakes before they are old enough to submit them to cakewrecks.

Spook / November 29, 2011 1:08 PM

For Occupy Wall Street to become as "in" as Da Bears, 30 rock, Mad Men, "foodie sh*t, and all that other mindless bull sh*t that "Sheeple" are into, before it dies and we're right back to being asleep on our pillows of smug ignorance made in China purchased at Walmart on Black Friday at 5:00am

Andrew Huff / November 29, 2011 6:52 PM

A little time off would be awesome. Looking forward to the holidays for just that reason.

Dubi Kaufmann / November 29, 2011 8:52 PM

I want shorts that have a printed image of the Illinois centennial monument (the monument in Logan square). The monument will be on the sides to give the shorts a sporty look. Also when I put the shorts on and look at the mirror, I want the height of the pants to match its width.
If such thing exists, I want it. I want Logan square pants.

Carlotta / November 30, 2011 1:55 PM

-- nuclear disarmament

-- the IT person to fix all these fucked up workstations

-- a better paying job

Jasmine / December 1, 2011 2:05 PM

* an iPad
* driving lessons
* riding boots
* a pony
* drum set

Marie / December 1, 2011 5:30 PM

For people to re-discover empathy.

Anon / December 4, 2011 4:45 PM

I want to wake up tomorrow and find I have missed the end of December somehow.

mary s. / December 5, 2011 8:21 AM

i'd love a bamboo cutting board. and a family-drama-free holiday. :)

guy / December 5, 2011 12:47 PM

A phone call from my neuro telling me that the M.S. diagnosis that he gave me in June was all just a big mistake and the big white sparkles on my brain/MRIs were actually just residue from happy memories

O'Brian / December 5, 2011 4:36 PM

I want a box of iPads and some Groupons for a small man-pedi and 50% of Potbelly's. I also want a milkshake maker that works with rice so I can make rice milkshakes like they do in Tokoyo. I also want a deep fryer from Magic Chef and some Ungh Boots for a man. I also want some bike parts for my bike and a warm coat to wear with my Ungh boots. If they have it I would also like a Groupon for the Rosemont Horizon in Rosemont and Koerbarg chair from Ikea and some of those cookies and meatballs they sell there and some of that creamy fish they sell in a jar.

PMan / December 5, 2011 5:58 PM

A healthy baby and a raise to help support him.

jaws / December 6, 2011 7:38 AM

For my dog to talk for even 5 minutes a day so he can tell me what's up. Do greenies taste as bad as they smell? Did you really think you could sleep on the bed and we wouldn't notice? Why did you snap at the friendly dog you always sniff? Why so gassy? Do you hate your food or are you holding out for me to scramble an egg for you? Are you happy we adopted you?
My life would be complete if I only knew...

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