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Gapers Block published from April 22, 2003 to Jan. 1, 2016. The site will remain up in archive form. Please visit Third Coast Review, a new site by several GB alumni.
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Thursday, May 23

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brian / October 12, 2004 7:44 AM

It seems to be talking snoop-style. If I hear one more lamer say to me "Fo' shizzle", I'm going to explode.

steven / October 12, 2004 8:34 AM

Not too up on the current slang. Lately my days have been spent hearing terms like 'cbc count' and 'subcutaneous'. Maybe we should ask that celebrity, Paris Hilton, who recently trademarked the phrase "That's hot".

God Bless You, Paris.

Heather S. / October 12, 2004 8:46 AM

Maybe I am behind on this one but...


( )

the contrarian grammarian / October 12, 2004 8:53 AM

It's probably not really fresh or current anymore, but I'm still a fan of getting all up in someone's koolaide.

jakze / October 12, 2004 8:59 AM

i'm a big fan of 'rockpants.'

and 'haterade', but i don't feel like i'm adequately hip to pull off dropping 'unleashin the haterade' into casual conversation.

jennifer / October 12, 2004 9:00 AM

it does seem that i hear "that's hott" a lot more than i used to. i use 'hella' too much.

Mike / October 12, 2004 9:24 AM

Calling someone a "Chooch", I don't know what it's origins are but it basically can be used as a noun or verb for someone (usually a male) acting like an ass.

"That drunk frat boy yelling at everyone is a chooch"

"They just totally pulled a chooch move (ran) that stop sign"

"If it isn't old Choochy McChoochpants, out choochin' it up with he choochy friends!"

Bizarre, I know. But either someday it's gonna be huge or I'm gonna get laughed out of public places permanently, but I gotta know which one it's gonna be so I'm going to keep saying it.

Anthony / October 12, 2004 9:28 AM

Seriously, it's really lame to hear white people saying "howlah" (pronounced 'howl-Laa') or "howlah me back". I want to slap my two friends (that don't even know each other) who've started saying this.

I find myself saying "that's hot" a lot more, have to admit.

Michael / October 12, 2004 9:43 AM

I have no idea what the current slang is, although I do find it amusing that Mike uses the word "Chooch" - go with it, I say. We embraced that word in college fifteen years ago, and I've never heard it used anywhere else but the NIU campus until now.

And speaking of Chicago slang...anyone ever notice that the act of grabbing a car's bumper and sliding behind it after it called "skitching" by Northsiders and "skeetching" by Southsiders?

Thurston / October 12, 2004 9:46 AM

Mike brings up an excellent slang word, however I have always pronounced it "chawch" or "choch". I'm not sure of the exact spelling. Anyway, it's a great word because Chicago has so many of them (witness Lincoln Avenue south of Wrightwood on any weekend night).

Another slang phrase I like is "straight to the dome." This can be used to describe anything that affects someone mentally in a quick fashion, for instance a strong drink, a powerful photograph, an interesting conversation. Examples: "I went to an Obama rally yesterday and it went straight to the dome"; "The margaritas at El Jardin go straight to the dome."

Steve / October 12, 2004 10:30 AM

Chicago slang I can't use enough:
-- Spuds = potatoes
-- Cob knobbler = lame-o
-- Wanker = masturbator
-- Crib = house
-- Ducats = money
-- Gyros = beef lamb spam
-- Bob's your uncle? = Everything's fine?
-- Ken = understand
-- Def = cool
-- Fit = highly attractive

Yes indeed, I am one "hep cat." And now, "the man" requires me to "bounce."

E / October 12, 2004 10:35 AM

"Whaaaaaaaaaa!" (either with a '!' or '?') has been tossed around for years around my friends...and we live in chicago. Therefore, this answer counts.

Ray / October 12, 2004 10:50 AM

"Buttload" of something, to which I always reply, "What size butt are we talking about?"

vit / October 12, 2004 10:51 AM

I am not much for current slang. But I did refer to someone as 'a f***ing jagoff' the other night after a couple of drinks, much to the amusement of my out-of-town friends ... sigh.

Lexi / October 12, 2004 11:01 AM

If we're talking about writing, particularly web writing, I nominate the following formula:

[word]y Mc[word]pants

[word] is usually an adjective, usually used in a moderately derogatory fashion, to imply superiority on the behalf of the speaker and slight inferiority on the subject.

"Oh, so now you're Sleazy McSleazepants now that you're divorced? God, you're disgusting!"

"Dick Cheney was all Scowly McScowlpants at the debate, was he not?"

Look for it and you'll see it everywhere.

alfred / October 12, 2004 11:21 AM

Trixie is one i hear a lot. Like Lincoln Park Trixies. Someone is always bitching about them on Craig's List.

Alex / October 12, 2004 11:47 AM

I say we bring back "Neato!" into the mix.

cxc / October 12, 2004 11:52 AM

Is this "chooch" you speak of what I spell "Chach"--as in, a guy who is acting like kind of a tool, a la Chachi on Happy Days?

Andrew / October 12, 2004 12:04 PM

I often hear "...which is nice." I think it's an unwitting homage to Carl Spackler in Caddyshack.

"So I jump ship in Hong Kong and make my way over to Tibet, and I get on as a looper at a course over in the Himalayas. A looper, you know, a caddy, a looper, a jock. So, I tell them I'm a pro jock, and who do you think they give me? The Dalai Lama, himself. Twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald... striking. So, I'm on the first tee with him. I give him the driver. He hauls off and whacks one - big hitter, the Lama - long, into a ten-thousand foot crevasse, right at the base of this glacier. Do you know what the Lama says? Gunga galunga... gunga, gunga-galunga. So we finish the eighteenth and he's gonna stiff me. And I say, 'Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know?' And he says, 'Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness.' So I got that goin' for me, which is nice."

Andy / October 12, 2004 12:44 PM

My new slang-phrase is in the form of a rhetorical question, "can you deal?" which basically means "deal with it".

Cinnamon / October 12, 2004 1:00 PM

Heather S., we used fugly way "back in the day" when I was in high school, in the 80's, so I think it's an "old skool" revival.

"Jagoff" gets my vote as a Chicago favorite. Love it! And "asshat" makes me happy too.

salty / October 12, 2004 1:01 PM

I keep hearing "not so much."

Do I like hearing the phrase? Umm, not so much.

rob / October 12, 2004 1:24 PM

slang I hear quite a bit, in no particular order:

-- "Nice!"
-- "Good times."
-- ". . . up in your/my grill."
-- "Biatch" "You my bitches." "Up in this bitch."
-- "Suck it."
-- "In the house/hizzouse."
-- "this is how we roll."


jenna / October 12, 2004 1:27 PM

I find myself saying "I know, right?" and "innit" all the time.

amyc / October 12, 2004 1:29 PM

Do the kids still say "groovy"? I still do, and I'd hate to think I was uncool.

Steve / October 12, 2004 1:34 PM

I'd like to see "I'm all about _____" come back. You know, like "I'm all about Gapers Block!"

I'm all about being all about things.

MC High Life / October 12, 2004 1:53 PM

Terms I throw around:

The negative:
- "garbage bag"
- "weak sauce"
- "get beat"
- "grind ass"

The positive:
- "cat's ass"
- "top shelf"
- "total, classic action"

Here is how one would use them:

"Craigslist can get beat. That thing is total garbage bag. Pitchfork is pretty weak sauce as well but not nearly as much a grind ass as craigslist."

"NASCAR is the cat's ass. Watching the race on a Sunday afternoon is definitely top shelf; total, classic action."

TK / October 12, 2004 1:54 PM

All of a sudden I am hearing people saying right after everything.....Jane: "he is such a dick" Tina: "riight?". Not really a question, not really a comment, somewhere in between......

mw / October 12, 2004 2:02 PM

Where is the "something mc something pants" thing from?
It's driving me craazay.... I just started using it myself --without thinking, I called someone Flirty Mc Flirtypants....

Joe / October 12, 2004 2:04 PM

Something is 'Sosafied' if it is underperforming here at work.

"Why is the program so slow? The server is sosafied"

So named in honor of Sammy Sosa's dismal run the last few months.

When you put someone on a collision course with something else, you are "waving it around"

You and Jack believe 'x', Jim believes the opposite of 'x'. Wave Jim around by calling a meeting with you and Jack.

So named in honor of Wavin' Wendell Kim, the Cubs third base coach, who waved a record number of runners around into getting thrown out at the plate this year.

Thurston / October 12, 2004 2:17 PM

A slang term used by some of my friends is "beat like a red-headed step child," used to describe being defeated. It can also be used to describe something that sucks. Advance apologies to any red-headed step children, beaten or not.

kate / October 12, 2004 2:22 PM

1. "jackmunch"
a combination of and affectionate alternative to jackass and assmunch.

2. "ox-cock cold"
the point when it's so cold you can't complete a thought. most commonly occuring in january or february and always occompanied by a wind you're worried might freeze your eyelid to your cornea. as in "jesus, it's fuggin' ox-cock cold out here." i think it's pretty descriptive.

i can attest that these are only used in chicago because...well...i made them up. i suppose they don't quite fit the definition of slang but with any luck, or some help from those up to the challenge, i will get them into circulation.

MC High Life / October 12, 2004 2:22 PM

Thurston: That's a good one. I roll with the "beat like a rented mule" instead. Perfectly applicable for all your mule beating events. Holla at a stout burro.

eep / October 12, 2004 2:30 PM

I know [Word]y Mc[word]ypants got some play on "Gilmore Girls," which bugs me to no end because I was saying that long before them. Now I look like I steal my slang from the WB, and that's just lame.

I also knew I had to stop using "it's all good" when my boss said it in a meeting. My boss is the epitome of Not Cool. The only difference is that I usually tacked on "yo" to the end of the phrase, an annoying habit I picked up from friends in the southern suburbs.

anne / October 12, 2004 3:03 PM

The [Word]y Mc[word]pants or other Mc[word] derivitives was also used on an old "Friends" episode. I remember it was used by Ross who was dating a student at the time who he had a "Mc[word]" nickname for. Personally though, I'd much rather think of the "Gilmore Girls" episode I heard it on, than the "Friends" one. GG is the best show you're not watching on television. Daily Candy tried to make the old slang new again by referring to the "fauxhawk" as a "faux mo" and declaring it a new trend. ha!

Shylo / October 12, 2004 3:08 PM

I'm fond of:

- Craptacular "mancow is craptacular"
- Cock-a-doodle profit "it's payday. cock-a-doodle profit."
- Asshat "that dude is an f-ing asshat."
- Ho bag "that ho bag after my man!"
- Cakefucker "intern, you are a cakefucker."

Lisa / October 12, 2004 3:17 PM

The one that's going around my school is "fye" as in fire as in hot.

I can't think of any others. I'll go find some kids and be back later with new and exciting terms...

natx / October 12, 2004 3:28 PM

as of late i have deemed it my duty to bring 'douchebag' back into the modern lexicon. also, regarding the peculiar and seemingly widespread combination of the Trixie and the Hipster: i dub thee the 'Trixter'

jennifer / October 12, 2004 3:30 PM

the whole "i think i just threw up in my mouth a little" both on the internet and in real life needs to die.

E / October 12, 2004 3:33 PM

Mc[word]Pants reminds of the phrase: "you're such a [word] face." It's as annoying, if not, more. I've heard these phrases lately:

"Go to next Room" - Used when you greet somebody who walks into a room through one out of two possible doorways.

"Dodongo dislikes smoke" - Used when you want to refer to yourself as a gas-drinking rhinoceros.

"Grumble Grumble" - No explanation needed.

"Lets Play Money Making Game" - Used when you need to scam cash from unsuspecting travelers.

joseph / October 12, 2004 3:33 PM

I'm a big fan of douchebag. It's a classic.

I'm also a fan of greeting friends with a loud, long, high-pitched cowboy-style "yee-haw." This really only works outside, and you have to practice it for awhile before it won't hurt your throat.

And, I don't want to be a wet blanket, but the "[Word]-y Mc[Word]pants is way played out. Way, way, way.

katie / October 12, 2004 3:53 PM

jagoff is totally a southside chicago slang!

also it is the name of the group my boy is in. (

lately i've been saying "it's hot". my boy asked me if it was because of paris hilton's recently trademarked phrase. i had no idea she said that. i think i'm much funnier, of course!

Tom / October 12, 2004 4:01 PM

I into a dinosaur thing lately; it goes thusly. (In this example, George is known to a be a jerk.) Quoth:
"If George were a dinosaur, he'd be a jerkasaurus."

It's an amazingly malleable construct. I've used "slut", "hipster", and even "neocon", all to great effect. Try it and the laughs of your friends and acquaintances will be your thanks.

vit / October 12, 2004 4:11 PM

katie - apparently a south suburban thing too (but then again that is a bit of a blurry line sometimes). I remember my mom yelling at my dad for calling his fellow drivers that when we'd drive up the Dan Ryan to the city as she thought that was inappropriate to say around 'the children'.

::::HST / October 12, 2004 4:37 PM

According to my buddy who is a high school teacher, "treated" is still popular.

As in, "Oh, damn! You just got TREATED!"

Michael / October 12, 2004 4:41 PM

"Douchebag" fell out of style? Yes, then...bring it back, by all means. "Jag-off" has to be the quinessential Chicago slang term. "Craptacular" is another favorite of mine, which can also be used in conjunction with "Hey, [insert name]. What's crappenin'?"

yahoo / October 12, 2004 4:43 PM

I like "edger" which is someone who thinks his/herself to be on the cutting edge of the next trend, frequently identifiable by mismatched clothing. More extreme than hipster.

Derivatives are "ledger" (accountant types), "wedger" (one who squeezes in front of you at a concert even though there is not enough room), and "fledger" (20 year olds looking for an identity).

Kevin / October 12, 2004 4:58 PM

"Trixie" or "Chad" is so over but I still see and hear it a lot. "Asshat" warms my heart as does "fucknozzle".

Kristin / October 12, 2004 8:06 PM

If I hear someone say "not your mama's" again, I'm going to be sick. Please let it die. Abruptly.

Andy S / October 12, 2004 8:09 PM

Growing up on the South Side there were two words that, once I went East for college, I realized were specific to Chicago. First, calling cigarettes "squares": as in a man outside the Garfield Red Line stop asking you "do you got a square?".

The second word is the verb "stay" used instead of "live": "Where do you stay? I used to stay at 63rd and Drexel until we moved. Now I stay at to 48th and Kimbark."

Chri / October 12, 2004 8:31 PM

I use the work douchebag in traffic alot. Or Jack-off (Jag-off) etc...again while in traffic. If I am really annoyed and the driver is a female I just say "You f%cken c%nt"! Maybe I am just an angry driver..dunno....

Lucy / October 12, 2004 10:20 PM

I'm fond of of "Oh, for f*ck's sake . . ." I just find it very cathartic. It is not used enough in America. I think its hot when Irish boys yell it watching football (soccer). When jame's Lipton asks his famous question i want someone to say that.

vit / October 13, 2004 7:37 AM

Andy S -- I think that 'square' is a specific S. Side of the city thing. I remember hearing that slang from a few kids that transfered to my school and wondering what the hell they were on about. "stay" I'm quite familiar with.

I wish I could be like my cousins out east and casually throw around the word 'wicked' as much they do ;)

Shasta MacNasty / October 13, 2004 7:45 AM

Hmm....lemme see..

Fuckery: "Yeah, the girls and I are going out to cause trouble, mayhem, and just general fuckery."

FIF!: "I plead the fif!" Much love to Dave Chappelle for that one.

Hot Mess: When a regular mess won't do. "Girl, I got caught in the rain and my fro was lookin' a hot mess afterwards!"

winterfresh / October 13, 2004 8:23 AM

Jagoff, that I know is a cop thing as well, Ohhh geez, would dza lookat that jagoff! Icebox- that's fridge now a days, but I know people including myself who use it. I've heard "C'mon man, or hey guys, or hey man, said to men and ladies..." How about, "hey do you want to go to shoot some stick or something?" What is the something? Sloshed is nice, for example, I got so sloshed last night at BW3's.

winterfresh / October 13, 2004 8:24 AM

Ja%off, that I know is a cop thing as well, Ohhh geez, would dza lookat that ja%off! Icebox- that's fridge now a days, but I know people including myself who use it. I've heard "C'mon man, or hey guys, or hey man, said to men and ladies..." How about, "hey do you want to go to shoot some stick or something?" What is the something? Sloshed is nice, for example, I got so sloshed last night at BW3's.

Carly / October 13, 2004 8:28 AM

Chicago slang? How about "The Bean". I'm not sure if most "outsiders" would know what we were talking about.

Er, is that really slang?

michael / October 13, 2004 8:55 AM

My favs:

"what the shit?" -thank you Ben Stiller(envy).
"that's hot & Love's it" -thanks simple life. But I tend to write it "love sit". Frenetic if you will. Or "love sit, sit, stay."
"rents" as in parents
"chach" & more recently there counterpart, "trixie"
"da sack" as in Fond du Lac, WI
"cheesehead" hey, that's not funny...

Rudiger / October 13, 2004 9:29 AM

TV's Abe Simpson said that "they used to call [him] Grifty McGrift," another version of your Mc_Pants thing.
I use douchenozzle instead of douchebag. But then, I use jagbag instead of jagoff.

Mike / October 13, 2004 9:48 AM

Update on Chooch vs. Choch:

I think that these may just be different dialects of the same word. Interesting story; I'm from MN but most of my friends in Chicago are from the East Coast. Many of them knew people or family who at one point lived in Chicago and then moved back.
I guess what has happened is that they picked it up, brought it home and "New Jerseyfied" it and then passed it on to those three or four people who brought it back to Chicago.
It's like, dude, language is, like, a virus? Or something.

Also, [Something] Mc[Something]pants is one of my favorite formulas ever, it never fails.

amy / October 13, 2004 10:02 AM

Hot Mess.

Hot Second.

I am too white to say either frequently, but I do enjoy saying them nonetheless.

Jeff / October 13, 2004 10:12 AM

I'm with Shasta on fuckery. Jesse Sykes even drops that into the title track on her new record, "Between them trees/is all the world's fuckery."

Also, a gal I know from Florida swears by F.U.P.A. which is an acronym for "fat upper-p&*$y area." The whole hip-hugging pants thing makes this phenomenon unavoidable.

margot / October 13, 2004 10:16 AM

I think "do it" has really caught on, from Starsky & Hutch (as in, "I'll take a High Life, do it")...although probably all over, not just Chicago.

"I know, riiight?" (uptalking included) really cracks me up.

Jake / October 13, 2004 11:46 AM

The whole "you know, right?" thing freaks me out. I recently noticed I had been saying it a lot, and I have no idea why. Why am I saying this? When did I start saying it? Where did it come from? What TV show do I watch that infiltrated my brain? It's gotta be a TV show, right?

The thing I love about "buttload" is it probably started out as a toned down version of "assload" which actually means something. I.e., as much stuff as a mule can carry. I love the word buttload though. And boatload. And truckload. And fuckload. And shitload. Those are all fantastic words.

Mofo / October 13, 2004 2:47 PM

Jagoff is INDEED pure Chicago! Used to think it was uniquely Southside but learned that there even used to be a gang on the Northside (decades ago) called the Thorndale Jagoffs...

In fact, there is a band called JaGoFF from Chicago (they look like it too - tough guy Al Capone style) and they do old school Chicago Soul & Funk (go figure!)

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