Gapers Block published from April 22, 2003 to Jan. 1, 2016. The site will remain up in archive form. Please visit Third Coast Review, a new site by several GB alumni.
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Monday, October 14
I agree. Michelle Williams is a doll.
Uma looked like a dream;
Eric Bana looked like my dream.
Who the hell told Jessica Alba "sure, you're cute, but if you weighed only a bit more than your skeleton, you'd REALLY be a knockout!"
She looked like an ad for famine.
Naomi Watts was wearing a dress made of her own molted skin, I think.
This was the first time I watched the Oscars - my two favs:
1. George Clooney's speech: "owning" Hollywood's liberalism and "out of touch-ness" by explaining that it is these characteristics that force progress and change in this country. I loved him before, I have an unhealthy obsession now.
2. The South African film: "Nkosi sikelei South Africa!" (God Bless South Africa!) and when he asked his stars to stand and shouted "AMANDLA!" (POWER!) and they responded "AWETHU!" (TO THE PEOPLE!!) It was awesome.
Sandra Bullock looked worse than I thought any human could ever look.
The best actress category was pretty bad so I wasn't really about to be surprised when anyone won it, but Reese's turn on/off southern accent was funny.
On a side note, John Stewart should host every show of any sort...ever.
Oh - I guess I should comment on clothes too: There was only 1 person who looked breathtaking:
Did anyone else catch Cathy Schulman thanking her husband and her wife as the music came up?
Loved Reese! So glad she won!! She deserved it! She looked great too.
Did Jennifer Lopez look odd to anyone else? She had an odd orange glow. Too much faux-tanning spray???
Phillip Seymor Hoffman - black shirt, silver tie, bad shave just don't blend well with double chin.
Keira Knightley looked incredible.
Yes, Andrew. I heard Cathy Schulman thank her husband and her wife. But it's Hollywood! Anything goes! ; )
In between my naps during the show, I did catch a few things...
Sandra Bullock- wasn't a big fan of the dress. I thought it was boring.
J-Lo- I'm never a fan of those dresses that are fitted and then have a big poof at the back. They always look weird to me.
Sharon Stone- looked like she stuck her finger in a light socket.
Reese- looked cute like always.
Michelle Williams- looked awesome.
Charlize Theron- I was disappointed with her dress. The bow shouldn't have happened.
The woman who won for best animation (I think it was her) her dress was nice- the long sleeve on one side and then the hot slit up the other side was great.
And yes I did catch the thanking of the husband and wife. Not sure, but I thought since she flapped her yap the whole time that she was thanking the guy's wife. Who knows though.
And George Clooney- pitter patter.
Isn't anyone going to mention how Brokeback Mountain got completely and totally robbed for best picture? What a joke. If I cared any more about the Oscars I'd be outraged.
Jake needed to shave. Either do the clean cut thing or the scruffy thing,but not half and half. The bulletproof, scuplted hair and the scruffy beard looked dumb.
LOVED Felicity Huffman's look- the dress, the hair, the earrings-everything! Fab!
What was with the ginormous bow on Charlize Theron's shoulder? weird.
kate, I agree, I can't believe crash won best picture! I think this sums it up
I HATE awards shows--exercises in self-fellatio, they are, and further evidence of our celebrity-obsessed culture...
Sorry, I had to vent--it is Monday after all...
I thought Felicity Huffman deserved the Oscar over Reese Witherspoon. OK Reese sang-big deal. Felicity played a GUY going through a sex change operation.
Charlize totally ganked that design from my pre-teen fantasies about prom dresses.
I am still way disappointed, though not surprised, that they chickened out and gave best picture to Crash. I've already been in 2 fights today about it today.
brokeback was OBVIOUSLY robbed.
and, josh, this sums up better why crash was a total piece of shit. a glorified power point presentation, indeed.
ditto reese - felicity huffman is awesome.
nice that clooney got a nod, and also nice that he immediately said "well, looks like i'm not getting screenplay." good call, george.
and in case i didn't make myself clear, fuck paul haggis.
Why does everyone hate Crash?
waleeta...agreed on Salma. She is the goddess and everything I wish I looked like. I mean, did you not love the way she flipped her hair, straightened her dress strap, and threw her hip? Loved it!
Philip Seymour Hoffman - "I literally lost all control of my bowels up there," he joked backstage. "I'm lucky I got off when I did."
THAT would have been an Oscar moment for the ages and great headline:
Hoffman Wins Best Actor - Shits Self.
I left the place i was watching it at cause it was so boring!
Jon Stewart was pretty funny. He was a great host.
Michelle Williams was the best dressed.
Keira Knightly looked like RuPaul did her makeup. She seriously needs to fire whomever does her makeup. It always looks so awful, and shes quite pretty otherwise.
I dont even know where to start with reese. I cannot stand her and I think she ruined Walk the Line with that grating nails on chalkboard voice of hers. I predict shes back to popping out babies and legally blond three-quels within the year.
I was surprised they gave the Oscar to Crash, but in a good way. I never thought a movie like that would win an Oscar, especially when Brokeback was the obvious choice. Why does everyone think it was a cop-out?
The Hustle & Flow song winning, however, felt a little like afirmative action to me. Although I felt the same way when U2 was nominated for that awful song from Gangs of New York. You shouldn't nominate U2 just because they're U2 and you shouldn't award a good, not great, song just because it looks progressive to give an Oscar to a rap group. Jon Stewart's reaction was good, though.
What's with the husband and wife deal? I missed that. How does she have a husband and a wife?
Oh...and Jon Stewart and George Clooney in bed. I can get behind that. If you know what I'm sayin'.
Uma is a goddess.
Meryl Streep is my idol. She looked insanely gorgeous.
Dolly is my girl, too. I hate that Isaac Mizrahi had nothing useful to ask her and cut her off when she tried to introduce her date during the E! red carpet special. Isaac is a little queen and Dolly is way above him. After all, who sells a clothing line at Target and who has her own Appalachian amusement park?
I LOVE REESE, too, but my friend pointed out that it looks like horns are trying to pop out from under her forehead. If you check her out when she's not sporting bangs (like last night), you can totally see them. It's very creepy. Otherwise, though, I am so in love with everything about her and I love that she seems to have a wonderful, stable family life. I love celebrities that have values and don't have to act out and ho it up constantly.
It was pretty rote in a way: if one movie won for something, you should have known it wouldn't have won for something else. This year's selection wasn't going to be a clean sweep year, I could tell.
That said, my favourite award acceptances came from the foreigners who were all really genuinely jovial and happy to win. The only award acceptance that I felt was genuine was Clooney's and Hoffman's.
Clooney set the stage though -- all other speeches sucked after that.
Also, I loved that Crash won because I didn't expect it to (though when they cut Paul Haggis off when he was about to say something when they won their first award, that set off a warning).
Ang Lee winning Best Director sealed the deal at that point and while I still thought that Brokeback would win, I was happy that crash did.
But yeah, why the hate?
I've been noticing that ensemble cast films have been getting more attention and awards lately -- I wonder if this years Robert Altman nod was also a suggestion in that area.
This thread is usless without pics
Reese looked nice, same with Jake. Didn't like any of the dresses, all looked too promish. Alba looked nasty as always. Her age is really starting to show in her face.
I didn't watch but obviously the hugest moment of the night (and academy awards history) was Three 6 Mafia performing, then winning a goddamn oscar. Three 6, people. Juicy J and DJ Paul. Crunchy Black was also there I believe. Also amazing: how they immediately rushed the stage and went to the wrong podium, then ran the other way. The footage is on youtube. My prediction for next year's movie of the year: "Choices 3"
I would also forward the argument that Three 6 Mafia were the best-dressed
why all the hate re crash?
i will post the link again:
read this
sums it up perfectly.
I only like to gossip about people I know personally. It's more fun that way--especially when you know as many scandalous folks as I do!
I'm waiting for the day when we have awards shows giving awards for the best awards shows.
dress: hands down, michelle williams. everything was exquisite...the dress, the hair, the makeup, the necklace.
i also like how charlize theron managed to find another use for her giant taffeta 1987 prom dress. what was that about.
i'm glad george clooney won, his speech was wonderful. I'm sad they made Lauren Bacall read from a teleprompter that she clearly was having trouble seeing.
and as always, the only reason i even bothered to watch was to catch a few glimpses of joaquin phoenix and jake gyllenhaal. my joaquin crush has gotten out of hand.
I always wonder why people who claim that awards shows are stupid and not worth caring about always feel the need to crash (ha ha) the conversations of those of us who do care. If you really hate awards shows, why are you even reading this thread? I feel the same way about people who loudly proclaim that they don't even have a TV. Well, good for you. Now fuck off and let us have our fun talking about Project Runway.
Sorry. Anyway, as someone who does care deeply about these things, I'm so so offended that Crash won. I was pulling for Brokeback, for obvious reasons, but any of the other four nominees were more deserving than that simplistic, adolescent Kasdan-Altman-wannabe of an Afterschool Special. Gag.
Hayek, Williams, Weisz, Aniston, and Huffman (not Hoffman) all looked fantastic. Gyllenhaal and Philippe both needed to shave. Clooney gets hotter by the second and gave the best speech and the best reaction shots. Jon Stewart was terrific, I thought; I don't understand why he's getting such mixed reviews in the media. Then again, I liked Rock, Martin, and Letterman. Give me actual wit over Billy Crystal bombast any day.
I was upset that "Howl's Moving Castle" got jipped for best animation. It was SO much better than "Wallace and Gromit".
We should have the Oscars Travesty list, which would include such highlights as:
- 1982: Tron was disqualified for the Best Special Effects Award because they "cheated" and used computers.
- 1992: Marisa Tomei's Oscar for Best Actress in My Cousin Vinny
- 1995: Braveheart. Wow. Not only was it not as good as the awards recognized, but it was actually nominated for "Best Editing." If you go back and watch it, the continuity errors are so bad it sometimes looks like a gag in I'm Gonna Git You Sucka.
- 2000. Julia Roberts. Forgets to thank, oh, I dunno, ERIN BROCKOVICH. Good thing she remebered to thank everyone else, though.
I'm sure there are more that people can share. It sounds like Crash belongs on this list now.
And again I say, fuck off.
If this is to be a celebrity dog and pony show, I thought this was a great one. There were more than two decent movies made in 2005, which made this all the better. I thought Capone was a great film, PSH deserved that Oscar without a doubt. Reese's speech was forced - I've read articles about how cold she is in real life, and I think that speech was the most sincere one's ever seen her. She and Philippe will be divorced within 5 years, mark my words.
No one is talking about the biggest problem of the entire evening: Jamie Foxx. Let's let go of his pomposity, overrated talent, and ability to impromptu sing anywhere.
"If you really hate awards shows, why are you even reading this thread?"
Because I care deeply about threads.
"history of violence" was robbed flat out. i don't know where i would have nominated it, except best picture--so i'm not bringing any solutions to the table, i admit--but it was the best movie i saw all year. i bet i thought about it every day for two weeks after i saw it.
second best movie: brokeback, also robbed. but think of the fine tradition of great films that didn't win the best picture oscar...
third best move: curse of the were-rabbit! it was a flawless film, in my informed but untrained opinion.
Doesn't anyone have any love for the penguins?
March of the Penguins was very good, but Murderball was my favorite movie of the year, so I am bummed it didn't win. Bummed, but not surprised.
I just wanted to add that my favorite part of the night was Meryl Streep and Lily Tomlin introducing Robert Altman. It was perfect.
Amen, josh. Tomlin and Streep rocked my socks off.
Michelle Williams was a *vision*. So, so, so lovely.
Charlize Theron and Naomi Watts were worn by their dresses.
Clooney cleaned up REAL nice after Syrianna.
Re: Crash. I give it points for having high ambitions, but I didn't think it was that great. Meh.
Viva la Altman.
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jennifer / March 6, 2006 11:09 AM
I'm sorry, but Reese's win and her very fake and forced on-the-verge-of-tears voice ruined the whole broadcast for me.
However, Michelle Williams looked fantastic. It was nice to see some color standing out in that sea of black and beige.