Gapers Block has ceased publication.

Gapers Block published from April 22, 2003 to Jan. 1, 2016. The site will remain up in archive form. Please visit Third Coast Review, a new site by several GB alumni.
 Thank you for your readership and contributions. 


Tuesday, April 16

Gapers Block

Gapers Block on Facebook Gapers Block on Flickr Gapers Block on Twitter The Gapers Block Tumblr


ken / March 21, 2007 11:46 AM

Moved back to Chicago after living in the Caribbean and South Florida

Johnny B / March 21, 2007 11:50 AM

Threw a yellow pike into the change basket on 294 back in the 80's

Andrew / March 21, 2007 11:57 AM

Johnny B: as in, an actual fish?

I drove an Aerostar minivan 80mph over a hump in the road known for launching cars. We landed, went up on two wheels for a little ways, then stopped and went back to see how far we flew -- the van scraped when we landed so we just looked for the freshest gouge. We found it further from the jump than anyone else had ever gone.

skafiend / March 21, 2007 12:20 PM

Went fishing on a small lake with three other friends in a tiny inflatable raft, about two friends too many. We lost all of our rods and reels in the water and almost put a hole in the boat when one friend was smoking pot and a seed popped out and hit the side of the raft, burning a hole in it. We had to row quickly back to shore while he kept his finger over the hole. We probably could have fell in the water and died.

Oh, and drove home pretty drunk the other night. What was I thinking?...

ChicagoJman / March 21, 2007 12:23 PM

Rockclimbing while naked and on LSD comes to mind. It's a wonder I lived through college.

vise77 / March 21, 2007 12:43 PM

Deciding to stay in Chicago even though it has a crappy transit system.

Bill V / March 21, 2007 1:00 PM

White water rafting in New Mexico on a river that was a couple of levels past my skill set. Of course lots of stuff in college, but who'd want to hear about that?

Jake / March 21, 2007 1:05 PM

Getting into a fight with a burly football player, while naked, because he said he was tired of looking at my crack.

Jake / March 21, 2007 1:06 PM

The football player was fully dressed, of course.

Clarke / March 21, 2007 1:10 PM

Got some quickie lovin' on the stairs leading up to the top of the Eifel Tower.

skafiend, on behalf of all the drivers and pedestrians out and about the other night, you're a damn idiot.

kate / March 21, 2007 1:34 PM

"Surfed" an el train.

Craziest. Stupidest. Scariest. Meh.

newdad / March 21, 2007 1:36 PM

Got my wife pregnant.

G.P. / March 21, 2007 1:48 PM

Get married.

In post-feminist America, marriage has evolved into an institution for smart women and the dumb men that they emasculate.

(Anyone who disagrees is either one of the above, depending on your gender).

suzy / March 21, 2007 1:57 PM

hey vince, the trib has video on the link but the salt lake video isn't working... better check your posts

Oopsydaisy / March 21, 2007 2:03 PM

Ate super-special discounted 2-for-1 hamburgers from a street vendor in Yucatan.

Violent sickness followed, with swollen neck...thought I was a goner and didn't bother seeking medical attention.

It took 3+ weeks before my GI tract was somewhat back to normal.

Not sure why the F I would eat hamburgers in land of delicious taquitos and mole.

Vince Jose / March 21, 2007 2:22 PM

Video works fine for me but now that its up on the Trib its redundant. Updated, thanks.

Looks like I wasn't the first to update it. Thanks again.

BTW, craziest thing I've ever did was try to steal a tassel off a curtain in the white house when I was 12. Turns out some large suited men with ear pieces and hand cannons where very attached to that curtain.

spook / March 21, 2007 2:23 PM

I hope it won’t be buying a Vespa( every body says they are much safer than motorcycles!) this weekend
while living in Logan Square where people blow through stop lights at 70mph!

p / March 21, 2007 2:36 PM

took bus to nicaragua by myself might be it i guess..broke into a home accidentally alot of stuff and jumped off lots of tall stuff..drank mezcal cut w/ scorpion poison..let myself into the superbowl..loved hard women..watched the movie IT in the dark..said candyman and crazy mary 3x in the mirror..lots of fun stuff!! Life is meant to be lived!

Honestly though- this question produces the same reaction in me as hearing the "word" irregardless used in conversation. Everytime i hear it on Elimidate or Blind Date it makes me want to throw my bouillabaise at the boobtube. I love stories, and live for them actually, but the labelling of things specifically as crazy sticks in my craw. Also....the word "crazy" much like "retard" is outdated and frowned upon. My uncle is not "crazy" he is "schitzophrenic." Your homework assignment is not "so retarded" it is "low-functioning developmentally disabled."

Eating capers is m'f'ing crazy. F capers, if you eat them you win the crazy contest.

Andrew / March 21, 2007 3:01 PM

Hmm, I didn't think I implied "mentally ill" in the question. Is that what's sticking in your craw, p? Because last time I checked, "crazy" had multiple meanings, some of them having nothing to do with mental problems:

1. Affected with madness; insane.
2. Informal. Departing from proportion or moderation, especially:
a. Possessed by enthusiasm or excitement: The crowd at the game went crazy.
b. Immoderately fond; infatuated: was crazy about boys.
c. Intensely involved or preoccupied: is crazy about cars and racing.
d. Foolish or impractical; senseless: a crazy scheme for making quick money.

p / March 21, 2007 3:27 PM

if you think i was being serious... you're crazy (inf.). but clarity is always welcome.

also- usage of the phrase "sticks in my craw" is as welcome as hearing old dudes calling pulaski ave. "crawford avenue". joys of life, truly.

and i'm serious about the capers.

Andrew / March 21, 2007 3:45 PM

Irony tends not to come across in comments.

skafiend / March 21, 2007 3:57 PM

skafiend, on behalf of all the drivers and pedestrians out and about the other night, you're a damn idiot.

Clarke, you are saying nothing that I haven't called myself or worse...
And I wouldn't have listed it under "crazy things I've done" if I hadn't realized it was, you know, crazy. And I didn't mean "crazy" in a dude, that was awesome" kind of way.

fluffy / March 21, 2007 4:13 PM

one day i packed up my stuff and drove by myself to washington d.c., where i lived for 10 months.

ate dirt (it was an accident)

acted like i was insane so i could escape an argument my 'friend' was having with a crack dealer. i had to get out of there.

cut off all my hair for an art 'performance'.

shaved half my sister's head. i'd been drinking..

i've made chirpy sounds from my apt window to see how people walking on the street react.

dumped some of my mom's hormone pills in my brother's coffee for a week to see what would happen (nothing)

i left home and lived on the streets -not for long, though.
(I was young)

Tried a dog biscuit to see what it tasted like

Got married

Got divorced

Moved to the u.s.

short stint at the um, hospital


crazy enough? there's lots more.

Fluffy / March 21, 2007 4:34 PM

that aint a bad've out lifted me

opp........sorry...." spook" / March 21, 2007 4:35 PM

I was so humbled, I even typed your "name" instead of "mine"

my bad!

Carrie / March 21, 2007 4:46 PM

There was the halloween that my best friend and I went to New Orleans and painted our shirts on (painted bustier for me). We didn't think we'd be the only ones, but we were. We had people coming up to us all night "OH! You're the ones with the painted shirts!! Can I get a picture with you?"

So yeah, sober and topless in public on purpose.

miss casual / March 21, 2007 5:40 PM

i had a margarita made in my mouth last weekend in florida by a girl standing on a bar wearing a skirt. and by 'skirt' i mean more like a belt.

not that crazy i know but im 29 and it seemed very crazy at the time.

jennifer / March 21, 2007 9:45 PM

a friend and I left london and went to antwerp to visit another friend for thanksgiving. after we had put our bags on the train, we got off to hug her and her husband. mid-hug, the conductor blows the whistle, the doors slam shut as I turned around, and the train headed out of the station. I jumped onto the small step of the train and held onto the little handrail. I honestly was planning to ride the train - on the outside - to the next station. I was crazy with the thought that my passport, my wallet, my phone...everything was going to go to brussels without me.

I ended up jumping back onto the platform, but only with my friends screaming and chasing after me.

sarah / March 22, 2007 1:24 AM

I knew someone who knew someone who knew the night maintenance guy for the Sears Tower and he snuck us up to the roof. As in the top. Where the antenna is. And the window washing machines run on a little railroad track.

The roof, my friends, of the Sears Tower is skirted by a low wall and I thought it would be cool to look over the west side as it is the one that is straight all the way down.

So I leaned over and looked down, almost lost my glasses and my boyfriend grabbed my jeans and yelled at me. The sidewalk was very tiny.

But still the coolest place I've ever been.

(Oh, I drove through the worst slum in South Africa, which is not Soweto, it is Hillbrow. Soweto was safe.)

Steve / March 22, 2007 2:15 AM

Tried to walk from DeKalb to Aurora frosh year of college. Along 88, a "controlled access roadway."

Cops gave us a warning. And a ride to our destination, the train station.

anon / March 22, 2007 9:16 AM

Stayed up for four days straight doing meth and coke, smoking weed, a ton of cigarettes, drinking beer, wine, liquor and just generally testing the limits of my own stupidity.

skafiend / March 22, 2007 10:10 AM

Oh, forgot... went to London for about a week and didn't tell anyone. It the plane had went down in the far Atlantic, or I'd been killed by soccer hooligans outside the Tower of London, my relatives would STILL be scratching their heads about how and why I was there....

stupid and crazy

p / March 22, 2007 10:40 AM

i got arrested on the train once for impersonating a velociraptor who patrolled the aisle yelping, snapping, nibbling newspapers and sniffing peoples books.

cops in lockup (may or may not have been) kicking the shit out of dudes (gangmembers!) and (may or may not have) threw a sharpie at my face "cuz my socks stink" and I'M the crazy one.

Sara / March 22, 2007 10:52 AM

Saw a guy on the London tube. Thought said guy was the hottest alive. Upon exiting the train, stopped in front of him and said, "If I could design a guy, he'd look just like you."

He smiled, and I ran off the train.

Mikey / March 22, 2007 11:39 AM

Don't know if it was that crazy, but sorta funny nonetheless...

In college, several of my friends and I attended a crowded house party where we knew no one but the hostess (whom we had met for the first time only hours earlier when we were extended the invite) in nothing but our tighty whities (boxer briefs in fashionable colors had yet to be discovered)...

I specifically remember the NIU basketball team being especially unamused for some reason and wanting to kick our collective asses...

paul / March 22, 2007 12:07 PM

Rock-climbing on a route in the Gunks named "Skeletal Remains".

I went on a caving trip to help some divers drop their equipment down a very big hole. After one hairy point, I had a cave diver call me crazy. That's gotta be the ultimate in pot/kettle.

Buying a cheap flight from Auckland to Fiji in 1987. The flights were cheap because of the coup they were having at the time.

I've done numerous things in a vehicle, both on and off road worthy of good stories, but I've only drove drunk (and I mean anywhere over the limit, which these days is a pint of beer) maybe three or four times in my life.

Anything else is probably still within the statute of limitations.

Erica / March 22, 2007 1:07 PM

I LIVE FOR crazy adventures and have way too many to list, but so far, this tops my list:
Flying in a trike (motor-powered glider) above Maui/the ocean. It was especially crazy because a) It was my husband's surprise on our honeymoon, so there was no time for me to mentally prepare; and b) The instructor said a lot of people cancel when they get to the airport. It's 100 percent safe, though, and I highly recommend it:

Crazy things mentioned in this post that I want to do:
1. Have kids
2. Shave my head
3. Eat something truly gross
4. Go international spur of the moment
5. Sex in public place
6. Sears tower roof

One more thing ... NIU represent!

Eamon / March 22, 2007 1:45 PM

Volunteered for the Windy City Rollers. That's clearly caused more strangeness in my life than I would have previously thought possible. Other things that spring to mind:

- Ran an Irish road block at the border with an illegal alien, then purchased several cases of bootlegged liquor.

- Escaped a poolroom brawl in Australia by grabbing the nearest guy and screaming into his face. Later that evening, set my own face on fire.

- Suffered a hell of a beating by two exotic dancers armed with my future brother-in-law's belt.

- Hired an oompah band at midnight for an impromptu street party. Allowed skate rats to ollie over me when I was tired of dancing.

- Shot at bottles with a handgun out of a moving Jeep. Later ate a 32-ounce slab of prime rib. Still later climbed Camelback Ridge and became violently ill.

This list was a lot harder to come up with than I would've thought, though.

ja / March 22, 2007 1:47 PM

-hopped a train, hobo-style with the plan of hitch-hiking back from wherever it stopped (it stopped about a 1/2 mile later).

-hitch hiked to Champaign from EIU and got a ride from Jimmy John -- the man himself.

anonanonanon / March 22, 2007 1:58 PM

Crazy- like insane-
got complety obsessed with someone. turned into a total stalker. i think about it now and scare myself- it was totally not sane behavior. i'd call this person's answering machine just to hear their voice. ugh...

sparky / March 22, 2007 2:38 PM

I climbed a mountain in Ecuador. Before getting stuck on the mountain, I should have read the part in the Lonely Planet guide that stupid American girls get raped and murdered on the mountain. What can I say? I was a stupid American girl.

Gnarly / March 22, 2007 2:50 PM

Similar to the last poster, a few years ago, I became completely obsessed with a woman I work with. While I didn't stalk her, I do consider my behavior absolutely inappropriate and insane for a 43 year old married father of 2 beautiful girls. It was like I reverted to being 16 again and losing my virginity. My wife would have had my ass on a platter if she ever found out...I scare the crap out of myself sometimes.

fluffy / March 22, 2007 3:18 PM

a few more:

I ended up in jail, and became a sort of peacemaker between all the prostitutes who were all pissed off because they found out they all had the same pimp- Roach. And Roach wasn't answering anyone's calls. So, after many hours, we all started talking and peace was made. Although, two hookers did have to fight it out in the 'fight room'.

dated james - you guys don't know him

passed out on some thorny bushes out in the country.

had a weenie fight -out of boredom. Some friends found some packs of hotdogs in my mom's fridge and started throwing them at each other- they explode in you face, don't you know? I've never laughed so hard.
(this was in jr high)

peta / March 22, 2007 3:38 PM

Started posting on Internet message boards.

d. / March 22, 2007 3:47 PM

you know, i've thought long and hard about this question, but i don't have a good answer.

i think life itself is crazy enough as it is -- i just add to it!!!

Jay / March 22, 2007 3:52 PM

I did a 40-mile run (for training), then went to a party and drank champagne like a fish. I was falling asleep with my eyes open.

Jay / March 22, 2007 3:55 PM

Oh yeah, when I was a kid I called a 1-900 number at church and then sent it out over the church paging system. The three hours of evangelical interrogation to follow was pretty hilarious too.

deshigrrrl / March 22, 2007 4:46 PM

i quit smoking.

cold turkey.

ok, so it's actually a good thing but it still drives me crazy six months later.

still going strong though, and i highly recommend it. perhaps this comment is for an other post...?

Eamon / March 22, 2007 5:09 PM

@ja: that's hilarious. I've always wanted to jump a train.

Oketo! / March 22, 2007 5:16 PM

Dove head first into a 4 foot deep pool from 4 feet above the surface of the water.... multiple times.

K. / March 22, 2007 5:20 PM

Lived in a house full of ex-cons and drug addicts (with a shared bathroom! and I am a girl) for three months. while there, I lived off of a large box of creamettes, a box of corn flakes and a jar of prego for almost two weeks.

What can I say? I was broke.

michael / March 22, 2007 8:31 PM

Hey, the lady who was on top of the Sears tower scared the S out of me! You win.

Cinnamon / March 22, 2007 8:59 PM

Came stupidly close to losing the boy I loved by moving to Nowheresville New Mexico. Had to package Mexican Jumping Beans for the gas money to make it back to him.

Around the age of 10, my brother and I would jump off the upper floor of a very large barn and into a huge roll of hay. We'd literally bounce out onto the packed-earth floor.

Drove across the country in a used Jetta that had one bolt (no nut attached!) holding the engine in place. Went through two mountain ranges, too. The car had the alternator for a Fox in it, and the power steering pump blew up (literally exploded) about 10 minutes into my road trip. Craziest thing I've done, stupidest thing I've done, and most empowering thing I've done, all rolled into one.

Joe / March 22, 2007 9:38 PM

Followed a beautiful Swede back to her room on the edge of town in Uganda. Then believed her when she said she loved me. I suppose you might throw in the many, many rides on the backs of mopeds driven by 14 year old boys through the busy streets of Mbarara, on the way to dinner, the hospital, the internet cafe, a night of dancing, wherever. The whole time was pretty crazy. And pretty fucking romantic.

sky / March 23, 2007 10:02 AM

I was the first to jump off some majorly high cliffs in Minnesota after no one would go first because they were too scared. (probably because we were on a backpacking canoe trip and would have been screwed if someone got hurt)

I lived with a Zulu family in South Africa in the bush. That was more of the crazy awesome nature.

Ocean Kayaked in the Indian basically ride the massive waves in and just fly...and then the waves kick your ass and you think you are going to drown and die. Rinse and repeat.

A friend once called me from colorado going through a major crisis and I got in my car and drove, from Indiana at 9pm straight to Boulder, with no cell phone, and then drove back 24 hours later. Sounds ok but I had no sleep and thought I was going to go crazy.

Snack Cake / March 23, 2007 12:20 PM

I went to Alaska to can salmon at the behest and expense of a guy I'd known for about two weeks. When the fishing season was over we hitched the Alaska Highway. My dad had doubts I'd make it home alive but I never felt threatened. Except by a bear...

vanessa / March 23, 2007 2:02 PM

I gave a weed brownie to a nun in high school.

Sir Charles / March 28, 2007 5:36 AM

Lol At Joe!
I totally feel you, I am in Uganda, and have those crazy romantic moments riding thru traffic(Me/her/moped rider)!! Livin lavida loca!

craziest: Punched my mom? hah! I was in a fight with her loser boyfriend, and she came between. Hit her by mistake!lol..we all froze...

Lockshock / April 4, 2007 2:00 AM

I couldn't decide on how to tell my roommate that I was gay, so I hit on him. He took it pretty well for a nice, suburban kid who goes to Mass on Sundays. x_x

GB store

Recently on Fuel

Urban Ethos [26]
What is Chicago's "urban ethos"?

Cool Glass of... [16]
What're you drinking?

Supreme Decision [22]
What's your reaction to the Supreme Court's decision on the Affordable Care Act?

Taking it to the Streets [20]
Chicago Street Fairs: Revolting or Awesome?

I Can Be Cruel [9]
Be real: what is the meanest thing you've ever done?

View the complete archive

GB Store

GB Buttons $1.50

GB T-Shirt $12

I ✶ Chi T-Shirts $15