It's been a few days since the last "Alan Keyes says something strange" story, so here's the one for this week: according to a list of Keyes quotes put together by Barack Obama's campaign team, Keyes said at the RNC last week that Jesus Christ would not vote for Obama, because of his pro-choice stance. Keyes also analyzed a quote from Obama, in which Obama said that he wanted to win big to give Keyes a "spanking," and surmised that Obama's use of the word "spanking" was somehow related to slavery and was insulting to African Americans.