Gapers Block has ceased publication.

Gapers Block published from April 22, 2003 to Jan. 1, 2016. The site will remain up in archive form. Please visit Third Coast Review, a new site by several GB alumni.
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Tuesday, July 16

Gapers Block

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So, you know how you have a dream? Or an idea? But your credit cards were already maxxed out? And your dad is still a dick? Congrats, because now there's a place where even the most ill-conceived, cockamamie scheme (but not in the British sense) can find a perch. And that's

George Bush is always yammering about the beauty of the Internets and finally I listened. This Internets thing is (pardon me, chickadees) the shit. You can find people, score some dough, and then open the state-of-the-fart colonics studio of your tootalicious dreams, my pet. Take a trip with me through the sometimes sad dreams of others on

we need a home
Requested: $3,000.00
Lender rate: 12.00%

please help me..because of a divorce i was forced into a situation where the lease was month to MONTH because of my dogs (which are very clean) i need to find housing a.s.a.p. i have been at my current job for 6 years..i have bad credit because of bad choices i made in my younger days.i assure you you will not be landlord has advised me i have till may 24th or he will lock the doors on the tiny apt i do have now..this was just told to me yesterday!! 10-12 days is not enough time.i don't have a lease so i am going to be homeless...please help..thank you, JEN

Carla culled the Web for sad stories like this. Anything that made her job a little easier. Those high school kids never listened to her careful lectures about the evils of credit cards, but maybe there was something about her that wasn't so convincing. The $1,500 Michael Kors trousers. The $3,000 Coach Rettardata bag. Her $800 Clergerie boots. She looked gorgeous, and flush, and (to the superintendant making $300,000K a year) simply fuckable. Sigh.

Emergency medical causes payday loan nightmare
Requested: $2,700.00
Lender rate: 23.75%

I am a single mother of three. My daughter went on a mission trip to Mexico and she was burned. She needed medical treatment while there and upon our return here. I had to make an unexpected trip there and then all expenses had to be paid before we could come back across the border. Thus began the payday loan nightmare.

I need to pay off these payday loans, ASAP. I need to pay Payday Select (575.00), (620.00), Americash (390.00) and United Cash Loans (390.00). I also need to pay off two credit cards for a total of (500.00) that I keep on hand for emergencies, but both have very high interest rates.

I have been working two jobs for almost two years now. My primary job, I work at a walk in service center for XXXXXX, we provide service to current and retired military members. My second job is part-time for XXXXXX, which I work as a security guard. I am an honest, hard-working person that made some very bad decisions at a desperate time. I currently earn $36,000.00 per year. Any help with this is very much appreciated.

Madrastra climbed to their apartment building's roof and looked at their neighbor's barbed, wrought iron fence. Her face was puffy, swollen with even more of the booze than she had in the bottle to her side. Madge gobbled down a hot dog that she'd bought and paid for with change from her glove compartment. The only cash she had left. The girls were at Claribel's. All-beef with only mustard. Ten floors with no awnings. Twenty days with no bids.

Property Improvement
Requested: $10,000.00
Lender rate: 8.50%

I am an attorney and a real estate broker in Chicago, Illinois. Each year I purchase several condominium units that are underpriced because of their condition. I rennovate the units, updating the ktchens, baths and flooring. I have previously floated the expense of remodeling on personal credit cards, which results in high interest and diminishes my overall return. I like the idea of obtaining capital from Prosper lenders because the rate is better and the red tape is substantially less than applying for and obtaining second mortgages. My typical timeframe for flipping a property is 6-12 months. After remodeling, I make a decision about the market for the given property and either rent the property for positive monthly cash flow or sell the property. I would gladly offer a higher rate, but the State of Illinois max is only 9%...which I find very frutrating because it shuts a lot of peple in Illinois out from any chance for a loan.

Keely took a tip from the ad she spied as she placed her own missive for funds to open her own beauty parlor. Instead of, say, aiding flipper, which to her sounded like exactly the pancake logic her father warned her about, she became inspired. Sing the songs. Write the words. So she began scribbling on takeout menus and fast food napkins and all the sidewalks. But still nobody listened. And her beauty license lapsed.

Business Loan
Requested: $2,500.00
Lender rate: 8.75%

Hello, I am an attorney who has recently started her own firm. My decision to take out a loan is twofold. On the one hand, I need an influx of cash right now to cover some unexpected business expenses. And on the other hand, I know this loan with help to boost my credit score. I plan on buying next year, and I was told that I need to have several accounts in good standing for at least 12 months to help increase my score. I have several cases that are ongoing right now. Of these cases, two are cases in which I am paid on a contingency bases, so I will not see any funds from them until the case is settled. These two cases are in settlement talks right now, both parties want to settle, but I know that I will not see any money from them for at least two more months. Since I have been paying all the expenses for these cases, I need an influx of cash to help cover them. For the past 3 ? years, I have never been late with any of my payments, so I am confident that I will be able to repay this loan on time.

The accident was just that, an accident. Don't listen to what the detectives said. They had never responded to Marsha's calls before anyway.

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About the Author(s)

Shylo Bisnett loves ironing, baking, gardening and being a naughty housewife. Let her know what you think about Public Notice at .

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