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TODAY

Monday, June 17

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Airbags

I was cleaning the spare bedroom today and found all these piles of squirreled away stuff that I can "use later," from old shopping bags to gift wrap to magazines.

Yeah, I can be thrifty. I don't like to waste things. But I can just as easily blow some bills on fancy soap from Mertz Apothecary. Just like most people. So that's why the Craig's List free section does so much business. Thrifty folks looking for good shit. All you need is a pick-up truck.

1 beer short of a 12 pack.
Hello, i have 11 brand new never opened, or put on ice, Augsburger Dark Bier.you can come by and pick them up if you would like. they are extra from a party. if not i'll enjoy dumping them down the tubes, as i drink miller lite. so if you enjoy this brew you can have them. please must be 21 or older. thanks

When my intended picks up a new brand of beer as an experiment and decides he doesn't like it, he just brings it to a party. I thought everybody did that. Which is how we ended up with all this crappy Miller Lite and Old Style. Don't bring that - or Yellowtail Shiraz - to a party if you're over 25 or not really poor.

FREE AIR HOCKEY TABLE
100% FREE AIR HOCKEY TABLE. WORKS GREAT, ALL PARTS (LEGS/BOLTS, PUCKS AND PADDLES) INCLUDED. HARVARD BRAND, PURCHASED NEW LESS THAN 1 YEAR AGO. RARELY USED. ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS PICK-UP/LOAD ASAP. SW SUBURBS. INQUIRE FOR SPECIFIC LOCATION. IT MUST GO!

What's that noise? That tapping? Do you hear that? It's the sound of 10,000 "dudes" cranking out emails all reading "Dibs, bro!"

Can you blame them? Free air hockey table!

"BuffetLife" T-Shirt to anyone going to Jimmy Buffett Cubs game...
I have a small company w/ a couple buddies of mine... and it is called "BuffetLife... A celebration of food, Art, and Culture." FREE SHIRT TO ANYONE WITH A GROUP OF TWO OR MORE ATTENDING THE GAME!!! Basically the shirt is a Black "Hanes Tagless Tee", and I only have L & XL Sizes... On the front it has "BuffetLife" big, white, and bold in a real cool font... on on this perticular one i am offering... on the back it says... "You can take us out of the buffet, but you can't take the buffet out of us"... the shirt is very hip... Oh and i will deliver it if needed.... no problem...

If anyone is interested and needs pics... email me... serious inquiries only... Oh and proof of Jimmy Buffet Cubs tickets is a must...

Wait, I don't get this. If you read the headline, it makes you think that this is a Jimmy Buffett-related shirt. But take a second pass. Is this shirt about buffets? Like the Old Country Buffet? You can't take the Buffet out of me?

If I had to think of the ultimate Buffett Buffet, I would think it had endless plates of Cheeseburgers in Paradise, buffalo chicken wings, jalapeno poppers, potato wedges, assorted dippin' sauces, plus margaritas up the ying-yang. Oh, and some grass.

Eat up, Parrotheads.

free Wurlitzer organ
This is a for a used Wurlitzer organ. It works O.K.
Organ is mid 60's Wurlitzer. Is in good condition, has original seat, in need of minor cleaning of pots or tuning,

I want to get this organ, learn to play it, then make cute, entendre-laden babydoll t-shirts that say, "Can I play your organ?" Bitches, just watch how many free drinks I get the next time I go to the Cubby Bear.

Ad of the Week!

Masturbating douchebag
Everyone laughed when you screamed and I took a photos of your pathetic cock and yelled at you to put that shit back where it belongs. Didn't you have anything better to do than beat off on a train at 4am? Good lord.

Thanks for bringing a smile to my face when I banged on the window and you jumped when I got off the train. I'll be laughing at your stupid ass all day.

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About the Author(s)

Shylo Bisnett loves ironing, baking and gardening. She will soon be a naughty housewife. Let her know what you think about Public Notice at .

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