As of January 1, 2016, Gapers Block has ceased publication. The site will remain up in archive form. Please visit Third Coast Review, a new site by several GB alumni.
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TODAY

Monday, April 22

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Airbags

So, as I mentioned last week, I had to go to Boston. Well, I stayed in the Naperville equivalent of a Boston suburb—Burlington. "In Vermont?" asked many of my co-workers. No, not Vermont. Decidedly not Vermont.

I didn't—to my deep chagrin—get to see much of beautiful Burlington, as I spent each second in the Marriott, the air redolent with Type A salespeople, fried food, and hotel carpet.

I had a good time, but after days with strangers, I'd return to my empty little room wishing to see a familiar face. But what seems to separate my businessgal heart from other Craig's List fans is that I didn't advertise for easy-breezy fuckery on the Internets.

Michigan Avenue Hotel Tonight - m4m - 27

If you are 18-27 and attractive, sexual, in shape and are comfortable masturbating or having sex with other people in the room then this might be for you. Tonight at a four star hotel we are casting for a new adult movie. Send your pic and stats if you are interested. It cant hurt to try and the financial rewards are great! Thanks

"It can't hurt to try!" No, it sure can't, Tony Robbins! I'm glad that this fella has made the distinction that he's searching people who enjoy having "sex with others."

Do you really think that this dude was really filming an adult movie for commercial purposes? Or just looking for a few hottish financial aid college studs to come over and schtup his "ballin' chain?"

Coming to town for Business on 5/30 (Memorial Day) - m4w 35

35 year old White Male coming to town for a 3 day business trip.

I'm wide open on Monday 5/30 (Memorial Day) and I'm looking for a confident, flirty, intelligent and attractive woman to show me around town during the day (maybe there are some fun Memorial Day concerts or something?) Then if we click, we can do dinner and drinks and see where things go from there.

I've got a room at a very nice hotel if things really get hot. Look forward to hearing from you (pics would be nice but not necessary ... not yet at least)

Cue that Pottery Barn "Summer Fling" CD you picked up last fall on clearance! At least this guy leaves open the door to romance. But, oh wait, is that my cynic's heart beating pitter pat? Yes, it is. Who in the hell has a three-day "business trip" over Memorial Day weekend? Who, I ask, besides a married guy who wants to dump the wifey and chilluns for an extra day.

I'll be in town on business next weekend.
I arrive Sat. 21st in the morning and am available through Sunday night, (w/ co-workers all day Monday and then head out at 7). If you like getting a great blowjob for free, let me know. I will be looking to get face fucked in my hotel room as much as I can while I am there. I am 5'10", blond, blue, 170, hairy, 42 and real eager to please a top man who likes to be blown or have a nice tight hole to mount.

I have to tell you, I was sort of surprised at the mind-boggling amount of "fuck my face" ads from guys with hotel rooms looking for guys who are looking for guys with hotel rooms. I thought there would be way more guys looking for chicks. But it seems that either every gay man to ever have taken a business trip advertises for blow jobs on Craig's List or there's an awful lot of "straight" dudes who switch teams in the presence of shoe mitts and sewing kits.

Suck my Cock 38

5 11 195 cleancut shaved head

7.5 cut thick huge nuts 3-day load

looking for hungry cocksucker to blow me and swallow my load

no strings - anonymous a plus

send pics and stats

here on business at downtown hotel on wacker

(See above.)

I'm a model in town on assignment for the next week. Seeking a friend 23

I just got to my hotel and will be in town for the entire week! It's my first time in Chicago and I really would like to meet a woman to show me around in and out of the bedroom. I have a boyfriend back home in NYC and have only been with one woman. I'm real femme and drama free. A plus if you like toys. I brought all of mine! Can't leave home without them ! ;)

Do models really have to look around for hot, experimental chicks for no-strings lesbotronics? Because I think that's what happens when you change in front of each other, do some blow, and hang out with dudes names Marco.

This ad also included photos of the model. And if you don't think there's some boyfriend tagging along, hiding in the closet with a handicam, then you're retarded. And my brother is retarded, so I can say that.

What's the weirdest thing you've ever done in a hotel room? Me? Nothing. But I'm going to steal a story a friend told me. She was in a shitty, shitty hotel room in her hometown having sex with her boyfriend. Then she reached under the bed and found a balloon of heroin. I'm going to pretend this is my story. And I sold the heroin for a mini-spree at Contempo Casuals.

Oh, btw, you better come to the Hideout for the Gapers Block Party this Friday. I'll be there, doing Missed Connections on-demand at a cute little corner booth. Will you visit me?

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About the Author(s)

Shylo Bisnett loves ironing, baking and dancing naked. She dreams of being a naughty housewife. Let her know what you think about Public Notice at .

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