Gapers Block has ceased publication.

Gapers Block published from April 22, 2003 to Jan. 1, 2016. The site will remain up in archive form. Please visit Third Coast Review, a new site by several GB alumni.
 Thank you for your readership and contributions. 


Monday, April 15

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Steve / October 26, 2005 1:28 AM

The invisible man. I'm not dressing up or going out!

Stosh / October 26, 2005 6:30 AM

I am going to wear an Astros hat and put a noose around my neck.

bam / October 26, 2005 7:42 AM

A frightened roller coaster rider - Six Flags here we come!

ivy / October 26, 2005 8:46 AM


eep / October 26, 2005 8:56 AM

Malificent from "Sleeping Beauty." I've wanted to go as her for years, and this year I'm finally doing it. She's got that rocking horn-rimmed hood that will make it impossible for me to get into my car while wearing the costume without bashing my head. I can't wait.

anne / October 26, 2005 9:02 AM

A proud member of Team Zissou! (I knit my own red hat!)

Paula / October 26, 2005 9:13 AM

Eh - no parties for me this year so I guess I'll just stick on the devil horns when I'm home waiting for trick-or-treaters. I did buy a discounted ladybug costume at Target for my cat - I know it sounds lame, but the trick-or-treaters get a kick out of it when I dress her up and answer the door with her.

jen / October 26, 2005 9:18 AM

no-pants pirate

robin.. / October 26, 2005 9:30 AM

i can't tell you or anyone, because if i fail to pull it off, i'd like to reserve the right to rock it next year.

that said, it's going to RULE.

Nick / October 26, 2005 10:22 AM

I want to be Soxman (Batman with a White Sox spin) after seeing him on TV!

Carrie / October 26, 2005 10:32 AM

I'll probably go as white trash. I've done it before and I'm getting pretty good about trashing myself up... stretch pants and high heels...a white tank top with a black bra- strap hanging down my arm...fake me an excuse to swear like a sailor...

I also found a great 1940s brownie uniform a few years ago, maybe I throw that on for one of the parties.

Katie / October 26, 2005 10:59 AM

a giant, fully functional, box of Franzia! it's gonna be great.

ms lobster / October 26, 2005 11:00 AM

I am making an owl costume that is going to be damned cute!

hench / October 26, 2005 11:06 AM

tired and confused in a foreign city. likely also drunk and rumpled.

MikeH / October 26, 2005 11:36 AM

As one of the living dead/undead, but then I've done that for the last five or six years in a row now. I'm one of those who still believe Halloween costumes should be scary. Unless of course, you're female, and then I'm willing to let sexy and/or slutty slide...

Cinnamon / October 26, 2005 12:46 PM

Possibly my twin sister Cumin who was sold into white slavery.

Or I'll go as the crafter I NEVER want to meet.

Erica / October 26, 2005 12:48 PM

Rosie the Riveter -- it is possibly the easiest and cheapest costume I have ever devised.

Andrew / October 26, 2005 1:13 PM

A red crayon.

misty / October 26, 2005 1:22 PM

bird flu.

I dare you to dress up as a suicide bomber.

Veronica / October 26, 2005 1:23 PM

A superhero in transition.

Moon / October 26, 2005 1:42 PM

No one. So I'll tell you what I have gone as in the past:

A grape! It's real easy. Get an old sweater and twist tie purple balloons to it. Wear a green cravat or something! Bingo. Watch out for people with cigarettes. Those bastards.

The Hancock Building! Make cardboard boxes into the Hancock shape and put it over you head. Use black tape to make the crosses. Use one of the bee stinger head things for the antennas. (Think John Belushi)

A fly! Get a mini gas mask (without the face plate) Turn it upside down so the cartridges go over your eyes. Make it so you can see, but leave all the little holes because they look like fly eyes. Craft a couple of wing shapes out of hangers and put saran wrap over them. You can make the wing veins with a magic marker.

There is always the saran wrapped nude guy, but that's for special parties.

Godzilla! This one requires some work because you have to make a Godzilla mask out of papier mache. Used layers of garbage bags cut in strips for the body. Maybe it's more of a swamp thing than Godzilla.

Brenda / October 26, 2005 1:47 PM

Something sexy.

I hope.

slb / October 26, 2005 2:05 PM

Moon- I was the hancock building last year - it was great! so many people want to buy drinks for chicago landmarks!

this year, i haven't decided, and i'm running out of time. so i might end up being something crappy. i was thinking of being the 2004 electoral map, but the inital focus-group polling isn't looking so good, so i'm unsure.

Shylo / October 26, 2005 2:21 PM

I've wanted to dress up as a suffragette for a while, but I think I'll just go as laundry money.

K. / October 26, 2005 2:30 PM

Satan. And drunk.

Nicole / October 26, 2005 2:31 PM

I haven't figured it out yet, but it must fulfill my three criteria for a halloween costume: 1) somewhat original, 2) Warm, 3) NOT SEXY. Past costumes: 4 in the number Pi (3.14 . . .), the Supreme Court, zombie girl scout.

printdude / October 26, 2005 2:41 PM

i was gonna go as the heat Miser, but my plans for Halloween fun don't include costume this year.
Maybe i will go as the hillbilly that my forebears still are.

Moon / October 26, 2005 3:20 PM

Past costumes: 4 in the number Pi (3.14 . . .)


Rebecca / October 26, 2005 4:37 PM

Laura Bush

sky / October 26, 2005 4:37 PM

I'm going against the new trend of halloween for adult women equals dressing up as a slutty anything. Slutty Hancock building. Slutty pirate. Slutty poo.
I'm wearing gray and taping cotton balls all over me and when people ask what I am I squirt them with a water bottle and say I'm partly cloudy with a chance of showers.
My friend heard it on the radio. Cheap, dumb, a conversation piece and an excuse to squirty Slutty Kermit the Frogs.

paul / October 26, 2005 4:58 PM

In my mind I'm going to go as a cereal box with a bloody knife. (Cereal Killer)

...but that's only in my mind. I really have no idea what, if anything, im gonna do.

christian / October 26, 2005 5:20 PM

Mirror universe Christian. I'll be wearing white instead of my customary black, have a sunny disposition, and shave my goatee off, as all "evil" twins from the mirror universe have goatees if the normal or "good" twin does not.

Or maybe something else, I don't know.

leah / October 26, 2005 5:21 PM

Something bloody and icky. I am believer in the scary, too.

When did Halloween become a holiday about getting all tarted up? I don't get it. You can dress slutty any day of the week you wanna, ladies! We got the vote, already!

Brenda / October 26, 2005 5:22 PM

So, then you'd be going as a... good Christian?

Brenda / October 26, 2005 5:24 PM

Just because Frederick's sells those silly costumes doesn't mean anyone's wearing them... outside the bedroom, anyway. Don't believe everything you hear.

btw... "sexy" does not equal "slutty". Two different things entirely.

Emerson Dameron / October 26, 2005 5:30 PM

I'm going as a Vice Magazine "Do." That is, if I can find someone to go as a "Don't." Otherwise, I think I have to work.

leah / October 26, 2005 5:43 PM

Sexy does not equal slutty, I agree. Yuck, I hate the word slutty, but anyways...

I still think neither have any place in a Halloween costume.

Unless you're a bloodied-up skanky zombie. Then that's perfectly acceptable.

By my very important standards, of course.

(sexy hancock building--ha!)

Brian / October 26, 2005 7:42 PM


Brandy / October 26, 2005 9:20 PM

A Beet Ambassador.

Jason / October 26, 2005 11:57 PM

Humanities grad student gone wild: I'm going to take off my glasses.


hotopiaso / October 27, 2005 7:58 AM

I'm just going to beat my mom

Moon / October 27, 2005 8:41 AM

Oooh, look at the 95th Floor on THAT Hancock building!!!

spiraljetty / October 27, 2005 9:37 AM

I'm thinking Patty Hearst. The Symbionese Liberation Army uniform needs to look authentic or people won't get it.

Kim / October 27, 2005 10:01 AM

Me and 3 girlfriends are going as Jem and the Holograms. Mostly because we want an excuse for crazy colored wigs and 80s clothes ;)

mia / October 27, 2005 12:11 PM

a belligerent (non-sexy) banana

robin.. / October 27, 2005 12:33 PM

last minute, terrifying option:

frank, from donnie darko.


Leah W / October 27, 2005 12:42 PM

Trillian from Hitchhiker's Guide or Cyndi Lauper. I've not quite decided yet.

Or maybe just Disgruntled Costume Shop Employee, which I was for a couple of years.

Leah-less-the-W: Oh, the stories I could tell about the varieties of slutty costumes that exist. I worked at a store that catered to college kids. Thus: Sexy Dog. Sexy Bumblebee. Sexy Bikini Bumblebee. Sexy Tinkerbelle. Sexy Peter Pan. Captain Hooker. I could go on.

Klav / October 27, 2005 2:20 PM

My wife was trying to convince me to get a dog costume for our dog. I swear to Dog, the poor little guy would have had a brown furry suit on with a dog head.

I think my wife has something for dressing up the dog. The other day I had a dream that she had put a green button down shirt a black khakis on him. She was going to take him to work, and she thought if he was business casual people wouldn't notice he was a dog.

dan / October 27, 2005 2:56 PM

Steve Perry. It's the first time a Journey reference has become relevant in 20 years. Gotta seize the moment!

kel / October 27, 2005 4:04 PM

iPod person. Dress up as a silhouette in all black, put your white ear buds in and dance around with your iPod all night.

mike / October 27, 2005 4:23 PM

A good couple costume is Grant Wood's American Gothic, hanging on the wall at our own Art Institute.

Guy: denim overalls, plasic pitchfork (available at any costume shop - - just paint the red part black), circular glasses
Girl: White collared shirt under a conservative dress, cameo.

When people ask who you are, stand together, guy to girl's right, and look grim.

Eamon / October 27, 2005 4:29 PM

I can't tell you what I'll be wearing, but if you swing by the 1500 block of Norwood during Monday's trick-or-treating, you'll see me.

Leelah / October 27, 2005 9:05 PM

The Corpse Bride...

In the past I've been: Medusa, a Demon, Maleficent (It's a great costume that I made myself, including the crazy horn hat!) Ginger from Gilligan's Island (Steve was the Skipper), a lobster, Storm from the X-Men, Sally from the Nightmare Before Christmas, Baby Jane... I'm sure I'm forgetting some.

I love Halloween!

Baldeesh / October 27, 2005 11:51 PM

I'm going as a "Night of the Living Dead" era zombie.

My sister, Surprisey, is going to one party dressed up like Fallout Boy with a few other people, and then a slutty Tooth Fairy the next night.

shechemist / October 28, 2005 11:31 AM

I'm dressing as like a knocked up cheerleader.

Kal / October 28, 2005 3:03 PM

80's Nascar groupies.

rach / October 27, 2006 8:34 AM

I also want to be Patty Hearst but im nervous about finding the right costume for it so that people arent like- umm and who are you? any ideas..!

yes,shk / September 8, 2007 7:40 AM

homer simpson

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