Gapers Block has ceased publication.

Gapers Block published from April 22, 2003 to Jan. 1, 2016. The site will remain up in archive form. Please visit Third Coast Review, a new site by several GB alumni.
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Sunday, May 19

Gapers Block

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Andrew / May 14, 2007 1:04 AM

Question suggested by Roseann.

Justin / May 14, 2007 9:09 AM

I was too shy to hug my own sister the last time we saw each other.

spook / May 14, 2007 9:10 AM

Great question to kick off a Monday morning, thanks G.B

michelle / May 14, 2007 9:11 AM

letting my advisor at ISU talk me out of studying in England for a semester. She told me it would set me back a semester credit-wise since I couldn't take my education classes there. Big mistake on my part.

annie / May 14, 2007 9:33 AM

I have a few, but at the moment I'm regretting not paying any attention to my finances.

annie / May 14, 2007 9:33 AM

I have a few, but at the moment I'm regretting not paying any attention to my finances.

mike / May 14, 2007 9:45 AM

Not supersizing.

paul / May 14, 2007 9:46 AM

Not buying, or back when they were available. It's the only time to get the chance to make a million times an investment.

ab / May 14, 2007 9:52 AM

In high school, not making out with Tony K. when I had the chance.

Mikey / May 14, 2007 10:01 AM

My biggest regret is probably not applying myself more in college and giving more thought to my major...

Despite achieving excellent marks in high school, I did little else but chase girls and party at college, graduating in five years with a mediocre GPA and an equally mediocre communications degree...

As a result, 15 years later, I am on a mediocre career path at a medicore company making a mediocre salary, with a decidely un-mediocre amount of student loan debt still to be paid off...

wackpuma / May 14, 2007 10:20 AM

Not asking my dream girl to my Junior Prom because early the next morning I had the PSAT.

Idiot! Where were my priorities back then?

peta / May 14, 2007 10:32 AM

Not spending a semester of college in Rome when I had the chance.

Eric / May 14, 2007 10:35 AM

Man, I used to be steeped in regret. I didn't study hard enough, didn't finish my music degree, drifted through my twenties, woke up in my thirties, didn't wear my retainer enough, etc. But regret is stifling and it feels so good to forgive myself.

Taylor / May 14, 2007 10:36 AM

I don't regret much, but the one thing I can think of regretting is during a year off of college I had 3+ grand in the bank and instead of doing something cool like traveling to Europe I bummed on a friend's couch for three months and didn't do much else other than party.

mike-ts / May 14, 2007 10:41 AM

Going to college straight out of high school. I got great grades and did well, then was snake bitten in the job search in my field for two years afterwards. Work and career have always been a sheer cliff to climb ever since. I've known a lot of druggies and slackers who fell into great jobs whose paychecks can run circles around mine.

I deeply regret keeping my nose to the grindstone, and wish I had lived more foolishly, for then I could blame partying for the low place I'm in, instead of having it bother me that I walked the straight and narrow path of self-denial for future reward, and did what I should have done to get ahead, and it still didn't work out. At least I'd have enjoyed life, and had some great memories, remembering night long drinking, dancing, and partying instead of night long studying or trying to find the pinpoint error in the printout of a 1200 line COBOL program.

steven / May 14, 2007 10:46 AM

I regret reading Gapers Block today because it has reminded me of the things I regret. And on a Monday morning too. Great way to start out the week.

skafiend / May 14, 2007 10:53 AM

Realizing that she was "the one" much too late... and not being able to get her out of my head for the past year and a half.

Dutch101 / May 14, 2007 10:56 AM

Sometimes I start regretting the fact that I basically wasted a lot of opportunities during college and immediately after graduation. Then I remember having a conversation with a good family friend, probably one of the most accomplished people I have ever met, who sat me down in his giant office one day and told me that he basically wished that he'd fucked around during his youth for a while rather than working so hard.

I guess that taught me that regret is simply a matter of perspective. Might as well just go forward.

And my reward for my well-spent mis-spent youth is a network of friends and partners in crime (sometimes literally) all over the country, as well some really good, albeit hazy, memories.

eep / May 14, 2007 11:08 AM

I regret pretty much my entire senior year of college.

fluffy / May 14, 2007 11:10 AM

In the whole scheme of things, my life's not that serious or that important to be regretting things.

Really, I have no clue what I regret. This and that have brought me 'here' - they've all been my decisions and I have a lifetime of more to make. My life's path is definitely not a straight line -what the hell, right?

Maybe someday I'll be leading the parade. blah.

Josh / May 14, 2007 11:29 AM

I've made just as many mistakes as anyone else, but I honestly can't think of something I regret. By looking back in my rearview mirror and scrutinizing what I messed up is to overlook what I learned from it.

As Steven Wright once said - Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

P.S. Always turn off your cell phone before bicycling through a massive hail storm.

jen / May 14, 2007 11:32 AM

not keeping in contact with alan bush - this kid i liked in middle school then reconnected with a little into high school. with a common name like that he's near impossible to google, and i am always wondering what he's doing.

other than that, the same "too smart for the grades i got in college and now the shitty job i'm working" stuff everyone else feels. i'm working nowhere near my "ideal job", though i'm not sure i really even know what my ideal job would be. does anyone want to pay me to surf the internet all day long and find cool things? no? ok... =/

Jill / May 14, 2007 11:39 AM

I'm with Josh and fluffy and don't really regret a lot...many mistakes made in my life, but dwelling on them won't really fix anything going forward.

The only thing I wish I could change would be to not inherit my parents' skepticism of authority. That whole "do everything yourself with no help" philosophy doesn't really help when you're looking for work in a "it's who you know" world.

the met / May 14, 2007 11:53 AM

I have short-term baby regrets. Like when you're unloading groceries from the car and rather than make sure you have your keys, you just assume they're in your purse, and then you shut the door and realize you've locked your keys in the car. And you kick yourself for a few minutes, but once you resolve the situation, regret is gone.

For bigger stuff, regret is pretty short-lived. Making mistakes and/or poor decisions is part of living. I know I wouldn't be nearly as awesome if my life went perfectly.

JoT / May 14, 2007 11:59 AM

most recently...
1 not exchanging any info with sweet boy who helped with scrabble few weeks ago at guthrie's
2 not traveling more
3 being too shy in too many situations-see 1
4 not spending more time with my family
5 not giving more time to my art
6 taking a job
7 i regret regreting!

jen / May 14, 2007 12:02 PM

not photographing more while i lived in europe and the caribbean. i guess i'll just have to go back. :)

spending too much money on college, but now that i'm very close to paying it off after nearly 10 years, i guess it's not so bad.

jennifer / May 14, 2007 12:41 PM

taking grad school too seriously. as in, right now...that's what I'm doing.

going to get back to my paper with some fresh perspective. otherwise, I'll regret not writing it.


Geoff / May 14, 2007 12:53 PM

Not trusting my taste buds during the Pepsi challenge

james / May 14, 2007 12:55 PM

Sticking with a major that my alma mater let deteriorate (staff retention became atrocious after my sophomore year), just so I could graduate in four years. I'm now in a field that has hardly anything to do with that major and I'm content, but I often feel like I wasted so much time just to achieve the goal of graduating "on time."

Carrie / May 14, 2007 1:15 PM

Fluffy, Josh and Jill-- I'm with you. Although I am a bit disappointed I didn't listen to my gut when I was dating that cokehead. Maybe had I listened a little harder, I could've saved myself some heartache. But then, it was just a life lesson and he taught me that I deserve way way better than someone like him (and now I have the way way better someone).

jen / May 14, 2007 1:33 PM

Absolutely nothing! I can't come up with one darned thing.

kelly / May 14, 2007 1:33 PM

Starting smoking.

bucky / May 14, 2007 2:57 PM

spending years with a man a who was not a good fit for me. being hopelessly hopeful when i should have moved on waaaay sooner. ah, well.....onward and upward!

emmy / May 14, 2007 3:46 PM

I'm with kelly.

annfrankenstein / May 14, 2007 4:23 PM

That 7th beer.....

Oketo! / May 14, 2007 4:25 PM

I second Bucky.

Regret is a strong word.

Losing someone I loved more than I thought for selfish reasons.

Emerson Dameron / May 14, 2007 4:34 PM

Taking too long to warm up to people.

Allan / May 14, 2007 4:36 PM

To this day I regret cheating on my girlfriend when I was a teenager. I really cared about her and I know what I did hurt her quite a bit. Not to avert the blame from my own poor decision making but as a teen all I thought about was trying to get my bone on and thanks to hormones I would get hard just brushing up against anything of the opposite sex. We never got to the point where we were close to doing it but I always wanted to. When leaving her house on day her neighbor, a divorced single mom, asked me to help her carry some boxes out of her garage to the curb. Afterwards she asked me to come in for a minute so she could give me a few bucks. She reached in her purse and pulled out a five dollar bill. I reached for it but she put her hand on my shoulder and slid it in the front pocket of my jeans. It was weird. I didn't even think she was attractive but it didn't seem to matter I was as hard as a rock. The kind of hard where it kind of hurts being hard. To this day I can't remember if I got hard when her hand slid deeper than it need to in order to deposit the cash or if I had been that way the entire time and upon noticing, she assumed my condition was on her behalf. I just couldn't believe she was doing what she was doing. I ended up mounted on her plaid couch, pants around my ankles. I was mourning the event even as it was happening but still I was hard. When she kissed me her tongue was rough and when I didn't kiss back she stopped. She was the first to tell me how big I was and it embarrassed me and I felt like I might be sick and then it was over. When she went to the bathroom I left through the garage entrance. It had been open the entire time. I used the five to buy a slurpee. My girlfriend never found out. When I told her a week later, she cried and the way she looked at me after that, I knew we were over. We never went all the way.

Scee bob bob ba-dup boop / May 14, 2007 4:45 PM

-the smoking thing for me too
-not having the balls to say yes to the cutest guy ever, logan, ay me.

What I will regret most in a few years: agreeing to move to greasy grimy LA.

skafiend / May 14, 2007 4:48 PM

Allan, there's a "Letters to Penthouse" check with your name on it somewhere. The only thing missing was "...these things never happen to me!"

Mikey / May 14, 2007 5:37 PM

Damn you, skafiend, for beating me to the punch...

leelah / May 14, 2007 6:29 PM

Here's another vote for no regrets, though my mind will probably change later tonight when the aftereffects of the giant veggie burrito I just devoured hit me...

Andrea / May 14, 2007 6:49 PM

I turned down a chance to study in Paris for a year in order to start grad school. I should have put grad school off for a year.

mike / May 14, 2007 9:01 PM

To regret in youth is to not truly know regret.

erin / May 14, 2007 10:46 PM

not studying abroad in college. now i can't afford to travel out of the country.

PMan / May 14, 2007 11:49 PM

Not pursuing 3-4 relationships that could have been.

C-Note / May 15, 2007 9:19 AM

Should have played the piano more as a kid. My left hand's a claw and my right won't do what it's supposed to either.

Blagg the Axman / May 15, 2007 9:48 AM

Not slaying the Dark Lord Kayne when I had the chance, so long ago.

Lulu / May 15, 2007 11:00 AM

It seems an overwhelming majority of these posts regret something not done...lesson? DO IT!!!

I want to regret starting smoking, but it's been a whole lot of fun, can't imagine life without some of the people I never would have met as a non-smoker.

Generally regret not taking more risks, but it's all relative, and I'm good place so I have to appreciate what got me here.

skafiend / May 15, 2007 12:11 PM

It seems an overwhelming majority of these posts regret something not done...lesson? DO IT!!!

The flaw in that logic is that the "something not done" is simply one choice over another. These people have done SOMETHING, it's just that now, they realize it may not have been the best decision. You can't do both. The whole basis of regret is ultimately choosing one thing over the other and then later finding out that the other thing would have been the better move. Granted some of these regrets involve "not having the balls" to do something, but many of them, like opting for grad school over traveling to Europe, are decisions. If everyone knew at all times what the ultimate best decision to make was, the word "regret" would not exist in the English language.

judy / May 15, 2007 12:29 PM

Breaking up with a long term guy because I wasn't ready for being settled down, then years later realizing what a good thing I had - and it is now exactly what I want.
Too late.

skafiend / May 15, 2007 12:54 PM


at the risk of posting way too often and too soon... we should form a club...

spook / May 15, 2007 1:15 PM

Hey Ska you’re like the Boondocks character, Caesar socratic, but
cheerfully and diplomatically about it
because I'm sure you can see a lot more flaws in Lu Lu's comment and perhaps Lu Lu will too
dying of lung disease in an oxygen tent in the ICU wing
surronded by her smoking friends. Geez I can see friends I met at the nighborhood public house, but bonding over smoking!

lisa / May 15, 2007 2:00 PM

not being ambitious enough in college - i followed my best friend and my high school boyfriend.
getting into credit card debt - i give away all my money and have nothing to show for it.
trying to contact my ex when i know it's just going to hurt me - someday he'll regret that he didn't keep me.

Judy / May 15, 2007 2:54 PM

hey skafiend:
The Lonely Hearts Club?

(I'd put a wan smile here, but I don't think there is an emoticon for that)

kate / May 15, 2007 3:04 PM

I sometimes regret being such a jerk.

Only sometimes though.

Lulu / May 15, 2007 3:34 PM

skafiend- I see your point, I was more commenting on how people choose to phrase that they regret "not doing xyz...", such as the travel/school regret, they don't regret going to grad school, they regret not traveling first (or whatever). After reading people's comments it just seems like generally people wish they had taken more chances as opposed to actually regretting what they have done.

spook: you're ignorant.

I am former smoker and it was very hard to quit, I often found myself wishing I never started, but the reality is that it was part of my life for a long time and the smoking related memories and friends are impossible to regret. I don't believe I will be dying of lung disease, but thanks for being a fear monger.

skafiend / May 15, 2007 3:35 PM

I stopped smoking about three years ago. OK, I cheat and sneak a smoke maybe once a month, but I can still hang with the friends who puff away with regularity and not imbibe.

Yeah I sorta guess there is a name for it, but Lonely Hearts to me suggests not having anyone at all in your life. I'm thinking of people who may have someone in their life and know that the absolute perfect person is out there, they know who that person is, they HAD that person, and blew it.

Maybe the FOOLISH Hearts Club. Think we can still get Sgt. Pepper to play?

Eric / May 15, 2007 3:38 PM

I don't regret having smoked. I effing loved it. I was all into the dunhills, nat shermans, and handrolled smokes. Sometimes I really miss having a cigarette after a big meal with my closest friends.

I don't regret quitting either though.

Judy / May 15, 2007 3:53 PM

Foolish Hearts Club it is!

other regrets?
Not doing more for my dad before he died.

Perhaps I could preface that with:
I wish I'd been in more of a position to help my dad more before he died.

I don't mind the way I did my education (haphazardly, over years).
I learned so much!

spook / May 15, 2007 4:02 PM


Ignorant? come on now.
Fear monger? I think I’m just telling the unvarnished truth
but I guess the important thing is you quit.

But screw it, I guess it depends on how much you smoked. I mean would this apply for a heroine or crack?

But for full disclosure
I have a one cigar every two week habit.
because I think it’s “relatively” safe

And I’m tired of
Skafiend and Judy types with these…. I ruined the relationship with “the one” and now realize that person was “the one”!

More disclosure, perhaps it’s pissing me off, because believe it or not, sometimes I feel like I’m in the same rotten boat and it kinda sucks.
But come on good people! Where is the rallying cry!
I mean if it was supposed to have worked it would have worked!
Wouldn’t it? Right?

Judy / May 15, 2007 4:20 PM

um, Lulu, the whole point of this exercise was to say something we regret.

I'm sorry you are "tired of" my "type" of regret, but who the hell are you to judge? Didn't realize this was up for a vote.

as / May 15, 2007 4:35 PM

Not dating Jill when were both single.

spook / May 15, 2007 4:35 PM


It just my snarky way of saying I might be in the same boat as you and Ska
while attempting to keep some sort of personal decorum, thanks for blowing it for me grrrrrrr

Judy / May 15, 2007 4:47 PM

lol! Sorry bout that.
Sitting in an office with florescent lights for hours on end kind of dampens my snarky radar.

(and I even addressed my post to the wrong person above. Maybe I just need some coffee. heh)

jennifer / May 15, 2007 6:17 PM

not finding out about those jay ryan posters on until they were already sold out.

spook / May 15, 2007 6:26 PM

(Maybe I just need some coffee. heh)

Nope... (insert smile here)time to methodically turn off the florescent lights (I think they are always on), fight my way on the blue line to home, walk the dog with a cold beer

See yall tomorrow

Oudein / May 16, 2007 9:05 AM

Pretty much everything. My life is a shambles and there ain't no one to blame but myself.

However, I would like to address spook and others who self-righteously rant about smoking, in saying that there is no devil. No doubt there was a cause célèbre that you saw as the root of all evil before cigarettes, and there will be one to take on after cigarettes.

Why not look to yourselves, and set your own house in order? You will never be able to convince anyone of anything they aren't already inclined to believe, so spend the energy presently paid to your indignant rage on something worthwhile or helpful to yourself or someone else. Say, handing out food in a food kitchen... with your mouth shut.

Anonymous Man / May 16, 2007 9:13 AM

When travelling abroad as a friend with the guy I happened to be completely in love with, he asked the B&B for a single bed for the two of us. Not only did I stop him (afraid that we might not get a room at all), but I also was too chicken-shit to follow up with him about it. So, yeah, major regrets on that one.

Judy / May 16, 2007 10:17 AM

I generally use a leash to walk my dog, not a beer. (oh, man, cracking myself up here. too much coffee is not necessarily a good thing. But I do not regret drinking it)

I also /do not/ regret keeping my doggy even through some really rough times where I thought I couldn't take care of him. :-)

spook / May 16, 2007 10:51 AM


Since no one wants to wear the gapers block Nietzsche cap it’s yours!

And yes I do understand, Sir, that the unfettered capitalistic construct that enslaves most of us intellectually and labor wise, continues to provide for a host of sins against The People.

But those of us who lent a hand a signature on a Chicago Smoke Free Campaign petition
Or even defended the justice of the now state smoking band in restaurants and bars
played a small but great roll in an amazing campaign that provides a ray of hope that together The People can triumph of the well funded Army of Corporate greed

Long live The Fidelistas!


I generally use no lease at all, I think its cool walking a120 pound trained friendly mastiff around the hood sans leash to demonstrate why dog training is noble and that there are very few bad dogs, but too many bad owners. Cops tend to be pretty tolerant too, although yesterday one did ask that I not violate open container laws by drinking beer on a public way while walking Truth. Still I do not regret it because I was not ticketed (smile)

Actually, I would never get such a high maintenance dog with out the expectation that my life is hopefully on a continued upswing because of proper training as modern urban revolutionist!

Salute, Friday draws near!

Vivian / May 16, 2007 10:52 AM

Not holding on to Josh in college. He was brilliant, talented, wonderful and I gave him up way to easily.

Ladies, never date a jazz musician. They'll only break your heart!

Vivian / May 16, 2007 10:53 AM

"too", not "to"

skafiend / May 16, 2007 11:01 AM

They only reason I bring up the "she was the one thing"... I equate it to (Dumb Analogy Alert!!) having the Mega Ball winning ticket in the lottery, and then willfully tossing the ticket away before you fully checked all the numbers... and then finding out later you did! I don't care how much of a "we must move forward" attitude you have... losing a sure $200 million will ALWAYS gnaw at you.

She was my $200 million...

Anonymous Lech / May 16, 2007 6:19 PM

Not sleeping with that gymnast that had the hots for me.

skeptic / May 22, 2007 1:20 AM

Recently my girlfriend of a year broke up with me. She had 2 kids I loved them all. It felt good to have a family.

I regret sticking to old habits, and not believing in myself enough to deserve her love.

Lnace / January 23, 2008 5:01 PM

Where do I even start. I regret not living the way God wanted me to life. (Trust me that will kill you) I regret not beating down this punk who bothered me in high school. (I took Judo for 3 years back then) Wasting years of my life hating my ex girlfriend. Not being more aggressive in life. Waiting too long to have a life. Allowing the perfect woman to hate be because of my immaturity. Lying to myself by telling myself that I'm not good enough, and sometimes that things are not as bad as they seem, and to others by allowing them to think that I'm more successful that I really am. Not spending enough time with family, and my real friends. Not knowing when to say NO. Respecting clowns who did not earn it. Not working out like I should!!!

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