Gapers Block published from April 22, 2003 to Jan. 1, 2016. The site will remain up in archive form. Please visit Third Coast Review, a new site by several GB alumni.
✶ Thank you for your readership and contributions. ✶
Tuesday, January 21
Work. Work. Fun. Work. Work. Fun. Sell house. Move. Work. Live without kitchen for months. Work. Fun. Work.
(badger badger badger...)
Bikes, alternative weeklies, business magazines, random parties, High Life at Club Foot, brunch at Lula’s, “Rock Lobster” by the B-52s.
Just one more year in which nothing significant has occurred in my life.
Laid off, collected unemployment, learned to screenprint, freelanced, got hired, resigned. Released double rap album. "Real band" played more venues.
Love, work (no job, shitty job, good job), school, volunteering, election (despair), DIY Trunk Show (joy), learning my limits.
"Love comes when you least expect it."
Bought a nice house
Played football, what joy
Kept both my wife
And gainful employ!
BURMA SHAVE
I became: a photographer, politically saavy, aware of injustices, a graduate, a job-holder, wiser, involved , and a Chicagoan.
The truth is almost always disappointing.
note to self: Dating sucks.
New home, new job, new attitude...celebrated one year of wedded bliss, two years of living happily together in Chicagoland.
A schmancy new look
And more writin' dint hurt
Perfection ain't free
Won't you please buy a shirt?
GAPERS BLOCK
Positive: moved in with the gal I love and don't it feel good being next to her first thing in the morn and when I go to bed each night
Negatives: almost everything else, from the election to the continuing deterioration of my job situation (I still have the job, but a creepy clueless new boss and continued shitty performance by the firm keep me nervous)
Seething melancholy.
2004 Haiku
Stayed indoors all year
Only left to move my home
Ah, freelance career
My yearly goals were accomplished. I became healthier, stronger and happier. I'm officially over Him and have someone new. Yay.
i went on 74 dates,
and did 59 shows.
or did i do 74 dates,
and go to see 59 shows?
either way...i love my j. crew sweater and my diabetic kitty.
I realized all that free time I thought I would have after finishing grad school was never going to appear.
Pink fuzzy dice and greasy spoons,
$4k of property lost,
an election full of shock and awe,
signifying nothing.
My whole family: nuts
Discovered acupuncture!
Sigh. They cancel out.
Ate too much bad food
Domestic comfort's sole curse
Must lose weight next year
Renewed acquaintances
With peeps from high school class
They're mostly still jerks.
Quit job. Started school. So far summa cum lauden so good. Sold my car. Said a prayer of gratitude every fucking night for my husband.
I'm loving these haikus. Keep'em coming!
I took it to the limit in so many ways. Moved some limits, nursed some bruises, but I'm up and ready for more. After a nap.
Fell in love again
then he moved to Oregon
time for more egg nog!
Must apologize
For my first post up above
Forty words too long.
Shock and outrage ours
At Ukrainian election fix
Never happen here?
Sally Timms spied by me
Chicago stop Monday morn
Starbucks kept her warm!
Won a signed football
From the week three MVB...
Crap! Paul Edinger.
(Oh, Alice, don't say that! The prospect of having free time after December 2006 is what keeps me sane!)
Master's degree, check.
Real job now to buy presents.
Merry Christmas, yo.
Knee surgery/laid off/moved out/bad boy/bad job/good job/good boy?
(Sorry. I suck at haiku.)
Caffeine, Nicotine
Sexual Deprivation
Metroid Prime Is Fun
Maggie's knee fixed
But then came unemployment
Mixed bag for sure.
Arcade Fire sweet band
Funky manic monkey rock
Sometimes critics right.
Steve's haiku's are not!
Four syllables his first lines.
Fixed, mixed, only two.
Rodrick might be right
Pronunciation varies
I prefer fix-ed.
los yanquis aca
saben nada de nada
que boludos, che
Que dijo Gardel?
Sabemos un poco, si!
Eres borracho?
YAY STEVE!
Rod: "Is Steve able?"
"I say symmetry!" say I:
"Able Steve is, Rod!"
Broke up with boyfriend
eleven months without sex
hello, ex boyfriend
Lisa's booty calls
To goofy ex surprising!
Try masturbation.
Readers bear in mind
Lisa and I are old friends.
No diss intended.
Lisa, I know fix!
One of my friends needs some love.
Do you have extra?
Not so surprising.
Nights grow longer in winter;
Cherry-print thongs fall.
Eamon true master
humorous haiku spring forth!
Bow before sensei.
Your praise is sweet, Steve,
But like David Carradine
I'm just a white guy.
Andrew and Naz weep:
Steve and I have ruined Fuel!
Please blame the solstice.
A razor belongs
On cheeks like a kiss
Not slashing across
The length of your wrists
BURMA SHAVE, LEO!
Today an old ring
was cut from my fat finger.
Goodbye, bad karma.
Steve can be jokester.
He gets regular lovin',
And now, so do I.
election aside
good friendships, little drama
pretty productive
All I'm saying is that 2005 better be rockin'.
Moved to Chicago.
worked. slept. drove. sold art. killed car. designed wooden bike, bought old bike, took bike apart to make it special.
20 words.
Women still can't stand me.
Gay men find me strangely attractive.
Still celibate.
Watched movies too much.
Why are these all haikus now?
I don't f--kin' know.
hello kitty, nice to meet you
we would like to take you home
come live with us
we love you
job? let's not go there
engaged to my greatest love
yay! he has a pug
Shortest day of year
We shivered, cold in the dark
Haiku warmed us.
In the year 2004
I found I'm a terrible bore.
My sis had a kid,
Yet nothing I did;
Next year I'll try to be more.
26 words, but what can you do.
oppressed. cheated. hood-winked.
thousands die, few notice.
all an effective cover-up.
what's left to hope for?
mere existence.
otherwise O.K.
oppressed. cheated. hood-winked.
thousands die, few notice.
all an effective cover-up.
what's left to hope for?
mere existence.
otherwise O.K.
So much sexual frustration here. If it was one or two guys I'd understand, but there's a ton of people, male and female.
"So much sexual frustration here. If it was one or two guys I'd understand, but there's a ton of people, male and female."
I have a solution - come to the next Gapers Block get together for... speed dating!
---
A long year of work
Met a girl, fell so in love
Bike crash, no matter.
The Gapers Block staff
Is grateful to all readers
For your long support.
great job.
dumb guy.
good friends.
lots of bars.
weird guy.
graduated college.
two jobs.
lost election.
no guy.
happy.
I'm not the new me
yet I'm a bit better off
than I was last year.
Political idealism and (hopefully) momentary disillusionment, an old house of our dreams, another ten short stories started but unfinished.
I have a solution - come to the next Gapers Block get together for... speed dating!
Favorite book, movie and food:
The answer to all three is Fried Green Tomotoes!
But seriously, does anyone ever meet anyone through speed dating? I'd be tempted to throw a monkey wrench into the whole thing:
"Hi, I'm Mike, I'm into Norweigan Black Metal, I hate dogs--I mean, I really, really, loathe them, they're a filthy abomination--I smoke about three packs a day and as you can see, I always wear yellow... every day.... 24/7... 365 days a year... always."
It's been a year of tumult
With one certain result:
The fools' vindication
And our isolation
A year of misunderstanding
24-hour news notwithstanding
Our fear of people brown
Causes my interminable frown
Handsome men kissing
From the pews I hear hissing
They say they choose whether to dig men;
When did Jerry Falwell choose then?
But this is all mere blather
As I'm selfish, and I'd rather
Date a girl I find fascinating
Then continue my ruminating
aarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh.
Gaper's Block helped me
Find a boy and fall in love
I owe them much thanks
great spring, lazy summer, hello DC, missed chicago, why grad school, heart broken, heart fixed, best birthday ever last weekend!
Hello 2005!!!!
barf.
stop.
eat.
labor.
birth.
nurse.
cry.
stop sleeping.
grow.
work.
day care.
new car.
write.
knit.
house hunt.
love.
you know what happened
isn't eight years way too long
maybe i can sleep
lush
gush
blush
slush
mush
rush
hush
move
lay
play
stay
drink
brink
chance
dance
cope
mope
scope
hope
tedious long year
of unfulfilled potential
next year best be good
I was fat, I am fat. Lost hair, lost a tooth. Drank, went to school, drank, drank, spent money, spent money, drank, and bought a new camera!
04 is over?
Went by way too fast for me.
I need to slow down.
Travelled the world, enjoyed friendships, served my Faith, taught high school, fell in love, travelled the world again.
Hmmmm...lets see- served with divorce papers only weeks after the new year, spending every $ I have (and don't have) on legal fees.....and still battling it out in court almost one year later. Now, if we don't reach a settlement agreement TODAY, it looks like I have a trial to look forward to in 2005. It's got to get better from here! Oh well- Merry Christmas & Happy New Year all.
Urban Ethos [26]
What is Chicago's "urban ethos"?
Cool Glass of... [16]
What're you drinking?
Supreme Decision [22]
What's your reaction to the Supreme Court's decision on the Affordable Care Act?
Taking it to the Streets [20]
Chicago Street Fairs: Revolting or Awesome?
I Can Be Cruel [9]
Be real: what is the meanest thing you've ever done?
Fredo / December 21, 2004 11:21 AM
More sex than the last couple years, less sex than I'd like. Oh, and the election sucked balls.