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« Football performance breakdown: Week 9 Fire Go Through »

Bears Fri Nov 07 2008

Footballic Ramblings: Bringin' Sexy Back!

Sunday, November 2, 2008, is the date that I started caring about the Chicago Bears season, why? A simple answer really [cue up "Sexy Back" by Justin Timberlake] because on that fateful day we fans of the NFL were privileged to view the return of Rex Grossman to starting quarterback for the Chicago Bears! Grossman, aka: Sexy Rexy, aka: Sex Cannon and with his return brings the tightrope-wire-act sense of drama that I, as a NFL fan, demand. I want to witness the taut unease Bears fans will have every time Rex takes a snap, "Will he throw an interception?" "Will his baby-sized hands fumble away another snap?" I want to bear [Hey! a pun-Ed.] down and stare at Bears fans as they pray for Grossman to be injured or that he simply complete a pass. This, friends, is human drama and this is why I watch the Bears. So, please, Kyle Orton, take your time healing up that bum ankle, okay, buddy?

Moving along with Grossman at the helm or with NeckBeard, the Bears face a daunting opponent who has the capability of seriously f*cking up the Bears day offensively. The Tennessee Titans, a squad that for the past two or three seasons has been evolving from "good" to "very good" to now, seemingly, "elite;" will hassle the Bears quarterback all day, while manhandling rookie sensation Matt Forte every time he attempts to run. And on the other side of the ball, the Titans have a two-headed ogre of a running game that will happily punish the Bears touted run defense all game long. Behind break-out threat, Chris Johnson, and human tractor/fried food expert, LenDale White, the Titans will gladly run directly into the teeth of Chciago's defense. Tennessee's o-line has the heft and talent to push around Ogunleye, Harris, et al, at will. Fortunately for Chicago, the Titans have an even shit*ier qb running there ship, Kerry Collins. Collins, who has the wherewithal to hand off to his running backs and take credit as being a "game manager," will be challenged to find any open receivers (or talent, hey-O!) against the Bears secondary. Furthermore, the weather is forecast to be somewhere between god-awful and suicide, so, yeah, don't look for a lot of points in this one.

What Else Is On?

The best game this week is CBS' second game of the double-header. Indianapolis vs Pittsburgh, the Colts who need to keep winning to think about the playoffs travel to western Pennsylvania where they get to matchup with one of the best defenses in the NFL. The Steelers will have a functioning but not complete Ben Roethlisberger lining up behind center and will probably rely on ball-control and defense to limit Peyton Manning.

The NBC nightcapper for the weekend is also expected to be a pretty good one as you have the defending Super Bowl champs, that'd be the New York Giants, traveling to innerdivision rival, Philadelphia, for what amounts to a must-win for Phily. The Eagles have to beat New York for not even a prayer of winning the division but just to keep up with Washington for one of the coveted Wild Card spots. Should be a good one, if you care about the East Coast.

 
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