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Pitchfork Music Festival Mon Jun 15 2015

Our Favorite Lines from Pitchfork Artists (Plus, a Contest!)

By Celeste Mallama

This summer's Pitchfork Music Festival is a mere five weeks away and we're pretty excited here at Gapers Block. To celebrate the coming musical smorgasbord we've compiled a list of ten lyrical gems from artists who will be performing at Union Park this year (and a little something special for our readers):

1. "Don't try me I'm not a free sample"
Shamir - "On the Regular"

Honestly this whole list could've easily been populated with Shamir lyrics - the young up and comer has some of the catchiest, smartest, funniest lyrics I've ever heard - but this one by far takes the cake. It's the perfect response to anybody getting on your nerves, although it loses something in delivery in the absence of Shamir's plus size personality. Catch the 20-year-old Nevada native on Saturday morning.

2. "I think you're a joke but I don't find you very funny"
Courtney Barnett - "Pedestrian at Best"

I would never want to be on Courtney Barnett's bad side. The lady's got a razor sharp tongue in her head that could cut you to pieces — and she'd do it without breaking a sweat, all while maintaining that signature dry monotone. Catch the Aussie Sunday evening — and don't piss her off.

3. "Always feeling tired, smiling when required, write another year off and kindly resign"
Mac DeMarco - "Salad Days"

Sometimes every day feels like Monday morning. Mac DeMarco gets it. Yes, you could struggle and fight and power through...or you could just write another year off and kindly resign. Sounds easier doesn't it? Catch DeMarco on Friday after work...or just skip work and catch Mac DeMarco.

4. "If you want all this and more, put your number in my phone"
Ariel Pink - "Put Your Number in my Phone"

This song does have great lyrics, but it's the "voicemail" in the middle that makes it, as a woman's voice explains to Ariel Pink that she put her number in his phone a little while ago and hasn't heard anything back and is just wondering...Catch Ariel Pink on Saturday.

5. "Don't cry, you can rely on me honey, you can come by anytime you want, I'll be around."
Wilco - "Jesus, Etc."

As you all know, every Chicagoan is required to memorize the entirety of Wilco's catalog before they're allowed to move here. The city has so much love for this band that although they will often book six shows at a time in Chicago you can't ever actually snag tickets to any of them, so Pitchfork's the place to see them. While there are so many lyrics to choose from for this band, these are the ones that make my heart melt every time. Catch headliners Wilco Friday evening.

6. "Seasons change, but I've grown tired of trying to change for you."
Future Islands - "Seasons"

While we were all distracted by Samuel Herring's wonky jelly-legged dance, Future Islands actually snuck some pretty poignant lyrics about love, loss, relationships and change into their viral single. Catch the Baltimore based band Saturday before Sleater-Kinney.

7. "Someone somewhere asked me is there anything in particular I can help you with?" "All I ever wanted help with was you."
New Pornographers - "Myriad Harbour"

I think about this lyric whenever I'm approached by someone in the retail industry who asks if I need help with anything — I need help with so many things — let's start with taxes and follow that up with relationship advice and move on from there — but shopping for jeans? I think I'm good there. Catch the Canadians Friday afternoon.

8. "And you take what you need, and you don't need me"
CHVRCHES - "Recover"

When CHVRCHES played Lollapalooza a couple years ago, Lauren Mayberry explained to the crowd "I've been asked why we don't have a love song, and well, it's because you can only write what you know." Ever since then I've always associated the band with brutal honesty, and these lyrics fit perfectly with that idea. Catch the Scots Friday afternoon before Wilco.

9. "I was debating Swedish Fish, roasted peanuts or licorice, I was so stoned and starving."
Parquet Courts - "Stoned and Starving"

Sometimes it feels like bands create incomprehensibly confusing lyrics just to create an aura of mystery around themselves — so you gotta respect Parquet Courts for the simple honestly of "Stoned and Starving." Catch the NYC act Saturday and bring a snack.

10. "Girls like guys who're ripped and buff and guys like girls who have big butts and girls are sad all of the time because good guys are so hard to find."
Shamir - "Make a Scene"

It's only appropriate to make Shamir the bookends of this post — he's the lyric king (as well as the video king — if you haven't seen his music videos go watch them. Immediately.) I don't even have any commentary for this lyric — just preach Shamir.

Think I've missed some clear lyrical gems from Pitchfork artists? Gapers Block has a three day GA festival pass to give away — enter by writing up your favorite lyrics from Pitchfork artists in the comments! We'll pick a winner at 4pm today, so make sure to use your email when you leave your comment so we can contact you! [Update: We've contacted our winner! Thanks to all who entered.]